NewStats: 3,259,586 , 8,170,562 topics. Date: Sunday, 25 May 2025 at 04:27 PM 5p125h

Romangalactic:
I like it when they agree to be golddiggers.

Guyinthemirror, saucecode, and Boss13, you were always right about naija based females and most of us know it. But more men desperately need to be aware of these things so they can employ safeguards for themselves.

Morning Chief, to be fair, she is completely right. She probably did not articulate her thought process by putting it in the right context. However, I agree with her. Women are hypergamous in nature and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Everyone wants a great life. At least we cannot go to the market to purchase items of poor quality.

In the past and which still occur in Northern Nigeria, a man should have established himself before considering starting a family. This established man scans through various families and decides to pick out a family he considers suitable for his status. He visits the family and informs them of his decision to marry into that family. If the head of the family is okay with the potential suitor, the young ladies of marital age are brought out on display and he selects the one he most desire. I think there was a bible age depicting this accurately - I cannot if it was Isaac, Jacob, or even both who utilized this method of selecting their wives. Please NOTE here - the illusion we now call LOVE was not a criterion.

Though society has evolved and is still changing, the same basic principles still applies. A man MUST be well-established before he considers starting a family. Nowadays, young men are placing the cart before the horse. Young men are chasing women instead of utilizing their youth to build a skill, career, business, or trade. They have completely forgotten about their DUTY - to acquire the means to take care of their family.

As a man's capability to provide increases, his options to access more women increases. A high valued man can get any woman he wants and women want high valued men. If you call that gold-digging, absolutely. I'm okay with that. No need to shame women. It is in their nature. Also, like she said only a man without gold shame women who wants gold. I will also add, only men with gold set up safety mechanisms to protect the gold from potential thieves.

Biglittlelois:



Somehow, I am the chauvinistic person with a victim mentality and other labels, but you fail to acknowledge Op's stereotype of Nigerian females when taken abroad, how crass and disgusting of you,

Statistics have shown that most African women who were sponsored via a marital visa end up divorcing their husbands. The OP was not stereotyping. This is a common occurrence. If you are unaware indicate so rather than spew rubbish in a public forum.

For every reaction, whether positive or negative, there must have been a trigger, e.g, a thread some weeks ago was on FP about a man who married his wife before traveling abroad, when in naija, he itted to treating his wife badly, and when she moved abroad to be with him, she got her revenge though in a terrible way, my point being, humans tend to mostly behave based on feelings and emotions about an ordeal, either sad, happy, hurtful, etc, actions begat reactions, which can lead to other things,

I guess you are also contradicting yourself here. Why would the woman decided to seek her pound of flesh when she relocated rather than in Nigeria. There are NGOs in Nigeria that women who are in a violent marriage or experiencing domestic violence. These NGOs are well skilled in providing assistance and also ensuring justice prevail even if the Nigerian Police is not interested in the case. Guess what - it is FREE too. Like I posit above, if you are IGNORANT, do not come to a public forum to spew NONSENSE.

You, a Nigerian man, is expected to know what i mean by "treating his wife right" when you know how this society works, but cos you want to be a chauvinistic sexist, you have to make it all about men,

1) most men here cheat and claim it's their right, nothing is done about it,

I hate to burst your bubbles. Many men around the world, at one point in their lifetime, have multiple sex partners. Including your well-beloved WHITE MEN. Yup - I said that because black women idolized white men with the naivety that they are better. Darling, white men cheat very well. Those who do not cheat, do not have the financial means to do so. Please note that I am not speculating here. Again, your idea of most Nigerian men cheat indicates your IGNORANCE on the behavior of men around the world. Like I said previously, if you are uninformed about a situation, do not come to a public forum to spew nonsense.

2) During divorce, the wives and children is driven out of the house with no property to her name, so she has to start all over again,

There are family courts in Nigeria where women can exercise their rights in the event of a divorce. Maybe you have not visited the divorce court and I encourage you to do so. Nigerian women who decide not to exercise their rights, choose not to do so. Maybe these women are either IGNORANT like you or do not know that they can exercise their rights.

3) For child , in most instances, the man is required to pay, say, #5000 for five kids, how realistic is that?
You cannot question the decision of the family court judge who is following the law. If the decision is unfavorable, seek an appeal.

4) For domestic violence, the man will be reported, the man will bribe his way out of jail, and that is the end of it, except when death happens to both genders,

Please see my comment on NGOs

So many instances and more, so why do you think Op is scared of bringing a naija wife abroad if not that he wants to eat his cake as it use to be in naija, and have it? Why cant he have a positive thinking regarding females here and hope or pray for the best?

The OP is only acting as a RATIONALE MAN. Marriage in the western world is not like going to the market to buy fish or kpomo. You plan for it properly, else you end up in misery. Again, if you are IGNORANT, do not come to a public forum to spew NONSENSE.

You guys must always have something to complain about ladies if it doesnt 100% favour you, ladies are making a stand lately seeing that marriage is not to die for, y'all are wailing all over the place,

Honestly, I don't know if this is true, but it is a welcome development. Marriage should ONLY be for those who are prepared for the rigorous COMMITMENT it entails. In my opinion, men are the BUYER and women the PRODUCT. If a man NEVER puts a ring in her finger, she will NEVER be MARRIED. Hence, a man should never pick someone who will DESTROY his life and make him miserable. As they say - CUSTOMER IS KING. Hence, men should be careful with the kind of product they purchase from the marital market.

Like I said earlier, if you treat your wife right, you have nothing to worry about, treat her wrongly, face whatever happens after.

Based on experience, you can NEVER please any individual completely. Also, there are always marital issues. Furthermore, in the Bible, the sole purpose of a wife is to please the husband. Deduce my opinion above on men being the BUYER, I think it is crazy to make a woman a wife and she decided to come along with hellstones. However, don't get me wrong here. I think it is equally wrong for husbands to treat their wives badly as well as neglect her needs especially when he can fulfill them. However, the point of "treat a wife right, you have nothing to worry about" is extremely wrong. The wife should treat the husband well because the man decided to pick her out of the surplus options and made her a wife - without that decision, the woman or may I say the girl will never be a wife.

I have read some of your comments. First, I decided to ignore you because you are completely IGNORANT. However, I had a change of heart and decided to respond to your comment for the benefit of other readers.

I think many women have lost the traditional values of marriage and are adopting the Hollywood illusion version of it. OP - don't let women shame you. Don't fall for the trap. If you know your worth, you will know you are the PRIZE and yes - many Nigerian women, including married ones, will want to marry you so they can relocate abroad. I know this. I have seen it happened and you will not be the first or the last. So PROTECT yourself.

LordKO:


Ignorance and sentiment are heavily written all of this post. Dem never tell you say if de carry a monkey from Oyinboland come Naija, and vice versa, it will still behave like a monkey. For your little mind, someone wey de greedy for money or power for instance go automatically begin de behave like a fair-minded person once you treat am well in de midst of abundance and/or unrestricted freedom. Your "if you treat her right . . . " sure means a man must be ready to kowtow for his woman for peace to reign, since some of una don't know wetin decorum be as evident in this your post.

Some of you (males and females in this chauvinistic battle) de always think say na only de gender una belong get sense. Abeg, sense doesn't know gender. Avoid always seeing things from a chauvinistic POV, it does make you look petty.

A sensible person can't be caught continually making biased utterances and doesn't need to abuse others to feel important. Enough of this crassness and victim mentality.

Your comment is very funny but well written. I read her comment and laughed. Sometimes, it is better to avoid responding to little minds.

GuyInTheMirror:

Thanks for your inputs, you seem to be writing from a position of having experienced the peculiarities of immigrating for a guy.
Your points are very golden and noted, sometimes it is good to see things from a different perspective and thats the reason I post here because it is good when you take advantage of the wisdom of others.

It is obvious this poster understands where I am coming from which I think makes a huge difference cos if you do not understand something it isnt easy to give the right advise about it.
Thanks bro.

You are welcome. Don't forget to seek the advice of a divorce lawyer before you marry. The $500.00 per hour would save you a lifetime of financial difficulties, emotional distress, physical stress, and even jail time. Yes - I said JAIL TIME. If you do not pay child , child protection services can call the police, take you to court and the judge will send you to jail. I forgot to inform you that you MUST include in the PRENUP who gets to keep the children, custody rights, amount of child to be paid per month, and alimony in the event there is a marriage dissolution.

I guess you now see the importance of a PRENUP. It is not just a tool utilized mainly by wealthy people. It is an important document for a marriage contract. Do not neglect the alternative option of having your parents pick a wife for you. In my opinion, I think it is the best and fastest option to get married. The Indians and Chinese or Asians utilized the form of marriage (Arranged Marriage) and it works perfectly well for them. When there are disputes and SURELY there will be marital disputes, you can rally around your family for and also extinguish the fire.

I will repeat again - do not let anybody, including your OWN FAMILY, talk you out of not getting a PRENUP. if she does not want a PRENUP, find someone else who will. If you do not get a PRENUP, you relinquish ALL CONTROL to your wife and automatically become a SIMP. You would live in constant fear throughout the duration of your marriage and only or mostly do things to PLEASE the wife.

Also, utilize your bachelor phase with making friends with the married Nigerian men within your community and seek their opinions, including their marital problems. Though many men don't speak about their marital problems openly, if you are close to them, they would advise you greatly. I wish you that best of luck. If you implement what I outlined, you will enjoy your marriage in the western world, and even if you divorce, your life will not be miserable, at least, not financially. Also, your wife will be committed and submissive because she knows the consequences which are outlined in BLACK and WHITE in your PRENUP.

Oh before I forget - NEVER marry a woman who is above 25 years and try to get a virgin and surely you can if you implement the option of utilizing your parental assistance. Also, to avoid deceit about virginity, include in your PRENUP that the marriage will be instantly dissolved if upon consummation of the marriage you find out she is not a virgin. Oga, don't forget, NO JOKES HERE. This is your life and nobody will live your life for you. Also, consummate the marriage in Nigeria and if she is not a virgin - waka peacefully.

BeautifulWoman:
I have had this thoughts bother me for some pretty years. Though it may not be the only part of a relationship, sexual chemistry and overall satisfaction can act as a pretty big factor when it comes to your happiness level.

Even the loviest of couples could hit a rut if things start to feel a little repetitive in the bedroom.

Sure, there are ways to spice up your sex life, but what if you exhaust your options? What if sex starts to feel mundane and routine instead of fiery and ionate?

That's when you start to think about marriage: the bond between two people who say that they will love one another 'til the bitter end and will only take the train to pound town with each other.

While polyamorous or Player lifestyles operate differently, on average, the sex life of a married couple stays between only those two. With a lifelong relationship comes a lifetime of sex with the same person.

The question is, would a man be able to do that? Or would he get too bored?

I do not know your age but I guess you are concerned that is why you created the post. Women like fantasies - which is beautiful. However, fantasies are not realities, and huge reasons women get upset when their fantasies don't come true or exist. Madam, the answer to you question is - CAPITAL NO.

For starters, the biological nature of men is different from women. The average man thinks of sex mostly within an hour or two. Second, sex for men is purely physical with an end goal of reliving their urges. However, for women, it is emotionally. To connect with someone they care about. Except a woman has a huge testosterone level, the urge to have sex regularly does not occur frequently as it does with men.

In marriage, many women get bored with having sex regularly. While men still stay active even at old age. Also, men can get bored having sex with the same woman too except the man has other life ambitions in which he commits his time and energy.

To answer your question - Marriage is not about having continuous repetitive sex except you want to procreate. Marriage is more than that. if having sex or the fear of having boring sex scares you, then marriage is not for you because definitely you would have to endure a lot of boring sex if you want to stay in your marriage. However, if spicing up your sex life includes keeping other partners or including them in your marriage, do have a healthy conversation and a proper agreement with your partner, and well good luck.

Nice write up. However, you forget the most important thing. The wife's obligation. Which is a duty to her husband. A wife exist to serve the husband and that is according to your bible.

GuyInTheMirror:
MODS PLEASE NO FRONT PAGE!!!

Hi everyone, so I am not a new member of Nairaland.
I decided to create this new profile so that I can be annonymous.
I was hoping to speak with some matured people here about the issue of marriage.

I am a 34 year old man who happened to immigrate about 2 years ago, I am a very gentle and highly ambitious person and God has blessed me.
I work for one of the biggest firms here in North America , I used to work in a great firm too back in Naija before immigrating.

Now to the issue of marriage, I am in a kind of dilemna.
I am the type of person that values marriage and a quiet life.
I do not smoke, drink or womanise. I am actually the type you'd call a church boy. I dream for a respectful wife whom I can love and adore and build a family with.

But it seems being in North America makes that complicated.
1. Majority of the women that surrounds me are in their 30s. I personally would prefer to marry someone not older than 26 years for personal reasons.
2. Many of these women are closet feminists and they tend to be much louder than the personality I am looking for in a woman I'd like to settle with.

I have attempted to start relationships with ladies that tend to meet my description back in Nigeria, but I became shocked cos it seems once a lady knows a man is abroad they become lovey dovey. They start to pretend like they are saints so that has put me off as I do not want a lady to pretend for me.

The options before me are :
1. Look for someone that is close to my requirement here and marry her and hope for the best.
2. Look for someone back in naija and marry and sponsor her to North America.
3. Wait for 2 more years, get my citizenship, come back to naija and blend in like a regular guy and try to meet a lady that does not know I am an abroad person to avoid pretense then try to get a babe. (In 2 years time I will be 36 years old, is this not too old ?)

I would like people with a lot of insight to educate me on what appears to be the best option.

I think I can advise you on this. When you say North America, I believe you are in Canada. Americans don't say North America. Anyways I will say without mincing words, you are not old at all. Even at 40, you are not old. Men age like wine, but women get to hit the wall as they get older. All your options are risky, but option 3 is less risky than others. However, whatever option you choose, do not fail to get a Prenup. You are in the western world where women's rights are recognized more than men. Regardless of the option you pick, have it at the back of your mind that WOMEN CHANGE after marriage. Hence, you MUST PROTECT YOURSELF. Many young men in North America and even Europe are no longer considering marriage and I am sure you have heard of MGTOW or REDPILL and if you haven't, please do - study up quickly and get updated.

Marriage is good, don't get me wrong. However, western values have bastardized the ideals of marriage and replaced it with Hollywood fantasies, add feminism into that equation, what you get is women and men with the wrong beliefs of marriage. You HAVE TO SEEK THE ADVICE OF A DIVORCE LAWYER before you get married. The hourly rate in Canada is between $250 - $500 per hour. Spend the money to listen to how you can protect yourself from marriage before you sign the marriage certificate. If you do not protect yourself you will lose all control regardless of the option you choose.

Also, do not forget the PRENUP I mentioned above. When you start courting your potential wife, ask her about the idea of PRENUP, and listen to her response. If she refuses, move to the next one. In your PRENUP, have your lawyer draft EVEN THE BASIC NECESSITIES such as SEX, the timing, frequency, favorite position, and even hour. Include the consequences, expectations, and financial responsibilities in the event of the dissolution of the marriage. Do not JOKE about this. Inform your potential spouse to have a lawyer review the PRENUP before g and sign and include her initials on all pages of the PRENUP.

My brother, even after a PRENUP, you are still not safe from a devilish woman. Next, you must set up a mechanism to protect your assets such as incorporating your assets either using an incorporated company or an LLC and transfer all your assets to that incorporation - your house, your car, your investments, and even your savings and have the incorporation borrow these assets for your utilization. For example, if you have purchased your home, transfer it to incorporation (a numbered company is easy to create) and have the company draft a rental agreement recognizing you as a tenant. You pay your mortgage as rental to your company and your company pays the mortgage with the same rental fees from you. Do the same with your car and other investments. Your lawyer can assist you with this. In this situation, no woman can take your property from you. Your company can eject her after the lease agreement is over. These mechanisms MUST have been implemented before you even dream of courting any woman. This means you should have these mechanisms like YESTERDAY.

Don't get twisted with LOVE. Marriage is not love. Hollywood and ment companies created the ILLUSION called LOVE. Marriage is DUTY and RESPONSIBILITY to your family. I am saying this so you don't get stupid picking up your wife and stay stupid in your marriage. Once your wife does not live up to her expectations in the marriage, the consequences in the PRENUP kicks in immediately and you seek redress. Both the PRENUP and SAFETY MECHANISM provides you with a safety net to avoid losing CONTROL in your marriage and lose your asset in the event of a divorce. Oga, don't start saying your marriage will not end in divorce in Jesus's name. That's bullshit and a recipe for DISASTER. You have to plan for it and protect yourself. Even in Nigeria, I know politicians and business moguls who implement the SAFETY MECHANISMS I outlined above.

Finally, I know you are pressured and concerned about marriage. Don't worry. You are the PRIZE. You appear to be well settled and doing well for yourself. Many young women will rush you even in North America but don't be fooled. I don't know if your parents are alive, if they are alive seek their assistant in picking a wife for you. Give them your criteria - Age, Shape, Height, Educational Level, Religion, Tribe, and Skills which includes the ability to cook, clean, and sticking to traditional values. Also, the woman has to be from a stable family and that means both her father and mother are still in their marriage and they are doing well financially, including all her siblings. Do not be an avenue to alleviate anybody from poverty. You might be shocked I said you are the PRIZE. Yes, you are. Women are the PRODUCT and men are the BUYER, if you do not put a ring on her finger, she will NEVER BE MARRIED. Many men do not know this and they keep on SIMPING. Now, do you want to put a ring on someone who would DESTROY you?

You can hit me up for more advice. Don't mind the excessive emboldened words. I want you to note them. By the way, I live in Canada.

MoodyQueen:
We will keep dragging every fúcking rapist on social media until you lot stop raping women.

Social media is the wrong place to do so without first obtaining justice. There are NGOs who provide to rape victims. Sharing a story for sympathy is not healing and sharing a story for a crime that has occurred for a long period of time serves no purpose. If you have been sexually assaulted, seek immediate justice. Share your story after you have obtained justice. This will help other victims or potential victims.

OP you are not ready for a relationship, don't even mention marriage. You earn N40,000.00 per month and still rely on your daddy to take care of your bills. It is quite unfortunate that your girlfriend is pregnant. I will be blunt here - You are not emotionally, physically, and financially ready for a family. You should not even be dating. Your focus should be on increasing your income and not sticking your penis in pussy, settling for your below the average income, and still asking for stipends from your dad at your age.

I know a lot of people have advised you on getting married and some good fortune would turn your fate around. Well, that may be possible, but also the harsh reality is that you cannot take care of yourself at the moment and when you add a wife and baby, your income will be 40,000 divided by 3 and that is N13,333.33. Don't forget unforeseen circumstances, expensive baby foods, and upkeeping, house rent, feeding, etc. You will only extend your hopelessness to your father who may become irritated. Your in-laws too would become irritated because it appears you have brought poverty and hardship on their daughter. Your wife will become irritated too because she cannot enjoy the good things in life. She may even leave the marriage if she can no longer bear the struggle love. You will become irritated because you cannot provide for your family.

Son, you truly know you are not ready to start a family or get married. I cannot advise you on what to do with the pregnancy, but one big failure of a parent is when you cannot give your child the basic necessities. Use this as an opportunity to set your life straight. You MUST stop having sex and focus on increasing your income. Stop putting the cart ahead of the horse.

Why is the Nigerian authorities so eager to get him now? Wait when the US is done with him and he through with serving time, you can have him.

LilMissFavvy:
You may not believe me, buy that is not a good man. A man who loves you genuinely would want to spend his life beside you at all times in the confines of marriage. You love him more than he loves you, accept the bitter truth. Don't withdraw from him slowly, rather cut off from him asap, do not limit yourself and drag yourself so much to the mud by accepting to be a baby mama. 26yrs is damned too young for baby mama rubbish. Look around you ladies far older than you are getting married daily.

Alternatively, if you feel you can't live without him, get another relationship, and double date, as you you double date, never ever allow anything intimacy with him, no matter what, don't let him sleep with you, you will be able to love another man, it's a matter of time and patience. If he is looking for a baby mama, let him go for a woman in her in her 40-50s. You are too young for such rubbish talk. Another suitor will come, open your heart and be ready to move on.

I want MEN to read this comment. This is what a WOMAN is writing. Pick out the deceit in this comment - Guess what, many women are like this.

Riele:
I happened to come across one davido thread where chioma was unbothered about davido's unfaithfulness .

My problem is not about the post but some mo.fons saying chioma should not feel entitled . Like wtf ? . You're engaged to a man and he's still cheating ? and You shouldn't feel entitled ?

No one in that post criticized davido instead they diverted their hatred to chioma .

Had it been it was chioma who was rumored to be pregnant for another man while being engaged , internet would have been on fire .

All these Useless Men don't deserve commitment . Please , if you have a chance , CHEAT ON THEM

I don't know how old you are. However, you do yourself a disservice if you implement your own advice. Davido is a high-value man. He is rich and famous. Women will throw themselves at him. If your advice to Chioma is to leave her relationship - where do you want her to go? She is a University dropout and already has a child. If she cheats on Davido, she will be out on the street the next day.

Please note this - all high-value men are not contented with one woman. Women are accessories to them and are easily disposable. Infact, these women have to prove why they need to be in his life. This is how high-valued men think and if that upsets you, please you can stick around with SUCKERS who would worship you. However, you will never be satisfied with these SUCKERS - you want to know why? Because of HYPERGAMY.

Confusedgirl869:
You are a very silly man sir, you go about insulting Nigerian women on every thread, you think marriage is all about sharing bills? What of giving your husband peace of mind? I work and can easily share bills with my husband. Should I burst your stupid bubbles? My man is afraid of marriage because he was once in it, with a WHITE lady, she made his life a living hell, he nearly died. That fear is still in him.

I have decided to let him go though. He is a very good man reason I am finding it hard to let go.

Just stop generalizing.

Are you willing to give him a prenup? Will you run to the courts and seek protection when he says he is no longer interested again?

Since you know his fear - tell him you would sign a prenup to reassure him. If you are not willing to do a prenup, then let the man be.

Skepticus:


The bolded is true.

The mystery and unpredictability that the single guy held to her is gone. Also, she may have probably married him for his ability to provide (as a beta-simp) while she has her eyes on the asshole alpha who wouldn't settle into marriage with her.

Now, she rations sex while also detesting him.

Marriage sucks for most men.

It sucks for men who cannot control their wives. If you maintain control, you will have the best marriage. How do you establish and maintain control? You must be a high-value man. A well-to-do man. You must be direct with a woman. You must let her know things you like and dislike and MUST never compromise.

A high-value man can have multiple women and all the women in his life will behave themselves.

Boredasf:
alot of my friends always complain of how their wife changed after marriage.
One called me yesterday complaining bitterly of how his soft and cool headed girlfriend suddenly changed after he married her;the guy is even contemplating divorce sef but the lady don get bele

It seems women treat men well during courtship than when married.

That is women. Don't blame them. It is up to men to understand this so that they can maintain control. In another post, I stated men must have prenups before they get married. They must list out ALL THE CONDITIONS and EXPECTATIONS for their potential wives. For example, Kemi must provide me with sex 3 times a week without any excuse and if she does not comply, I shall consider such a violation and seek alternative arrangements by getting sex somewhere else. Once, she signs she is obligated to provide you with sex 3 times a week and if she refuses, she knows the repercussions.

Guess what - she will comply. Women only act right when there is control. I have to be honest that I did not do this and I am regretting it. However, I am putting things in place.

Men - you are the buyer of the product. if you don't put a ring, she can NEVER get married. Hence, exploit all opportunities to maintain CONTROL in your marriage because once the conditions she considered prior to marrying you disappear, your life will never remain the same

Boredasf:
So married men in the house, do you regret your marriage
Please comment below.

When you have no proper knowledge about marriage and women, you will definitely regret your marriage. What I have noticed in marriage, men do not live for themselves anymore, they live for their wives and kids. I am not saying this is bad, but I have come to realised that you can never please a woman 100% - NEVER. Men must understand women are manipulative and controlling. If you lose that control, you will regret your marriage. Also, once you wife knows you have no control over her, she will run wild, blame you for it, divorce, or leave you.

Women do not love unconditionally. They love for peculiar reasons or conditions. When those conditions are absent, she will become a throng on your flesh. A woman will fall in line when her husband is strong and masculine. Lastly, if your woman says she is a feminist - don't marry her. You do not want a woman struggling for control in your marriage. There can ONLY be one captain and that should be you.

Men must understand this. A woman is with you because of what you can offer/provide or the potential ability of what you can offer/provide. Don't get stupid with the "I love you" nonsense you hear.

woodsbeatrice30:


Are properties shared in Nigerian marriages when divorce happens?did best man for a friend and I did not think I saw something like that..Please enlighten me..

This depends and can be decided by the court. However, many marriages in Nigeria still follow customary rules and many divorces do not end up in courts.

Corporate2020:
Useless miscreants, we guys are not begging untrained wives to bear our fathers' names. It does not add or remove anything from us. The only thing we ask for is, stop sleeping around so that you won't give birth to children whose father you cannot tell. Very soon, we shall be making DNA mandatory for all our children. And lastly, since you want to start wearing the same tros with us, be ready to share the bills too.

Nope - if you don't get the little things right, a woman will run you out. Women are like babies, they need control. If you don't control them, they run wild. If a woman refuses to take up your last name, don't marry her. She can marry herself or her father and keep her father's name.

donbachi:
Just bear me children...keep on with ur maiden's name.

SIMP

Since it is residential, why did the Landlord decided to enter into a rental contract with a business outlet. Absolutely wrong.

vickydankal:
I wonder why you are still with him. He claims to love you but not enough to kill his fears and marry you. Sweet sister , your boy friend is afraid of one thing and it is called “commitment and responsibility “. Leave him as soon as you can and wait for the right man to come. Any baby daddy is free to mingle with as many women as he wants besides no vow or laws binding him to you. He wants to eat his cake and still have it.

Marriage is not love. This is the confusion women have and when they are married they turn out to be witches. I advise all young men to have a prenup before marriage. List out all the expectations you want from your woman throughout the marriage. As well as the repercussions if she fails to fulfill her obligations and also what she is entitled to in the event of a breakdown of marriage.

Men - don't allow these women manipulate you. You are the buyer of the product and they are the market. If you don't put a ring, she can never get married. I never knew all these before I got married. Trust me, these smiling women will change when you sign the papers. However, if you have set the stage, you still maintain control.

Also, you don't have to be wealthy to have a prenup.

Unfortunately a lot of people have this notion that sex is fun. Actually, sex is for procreation and if this message was mainstream, only matured people will engage in sex.

Nairaboi:

My sister inlaw ( husband's sister) a lady in her mid 40s who's divorced and a hustler type still trying to find her feet .
The quote above is by the o.p, and that is why women will always remain wicked. You wanted to tell us a story about how you sister in law wanted to scam you. why bring her history?

To illustrate her point. Only desperate people engage in scams. If she was married, she will focus on her marriage and possibly, channel.her money problems to her husband. However, as we can see, she is broke and decided to channel her desperation to family .

ecolime:
Following,

This has been on my mind for months. Really considering relocating abroad to give the kids a better future in a decent environment. My challenge is wifey is not in and has always been against migration even before we got married. I've tried to convince her all to no avail.

I'm really fed up of Naija madness. We are doing great and earn exceeding well but we all know there is no certainty in this country. One bad policy and all you've laboured for can go down the drain in months or even days. A good example is the erosion of peoples wealth due to the continuous naira devaluation. Also, no social safety net too whatsoever.

I'm in a fix

If you are doing good and earning well, there is no need to relocate. Your children can continue their post-secondary education abroad just like what many Chinese upper and middle class do. It is really important for kids to have that cultural awareness before they are expose to the world. It increases and improves their confidence.

pakingzzzzz:


I am Kingsley Obinna by name, Igbo by tribe, 5.7ft tall, 34yrs old,
Chocolate complexion, self employed and I am based in Lagos..
I am seeking for a female partner from any tribe, excluding Hausa, to
settle down with, anyone who is based in Lagos would be preferable.
Should be a working class,m and could be any any complexion. She
should be kind in heart and matured in mind too.

I can be reached via SMS or call via 08164679552 .
Scammers and impersonators please stay clear!!

While I understand your personal need, this a wrong place to disclose your number. I don't know where you reside but I will assume Lagos and if that's not the case, there are still plethora of single women in any city in Nigeria.

Discuss with of your family, social circle and friends. You can also meet women in churches, offices, gym, shopping mall and if you own a car, try offering beautiful ladies a ride and inform them what you want and if they are not interested, they may have a friend who would be. Be social and likeable and put yourself out there.

ukaface:
African parents can never go wrong. They know it all,you can't correct them, because such would be termed disrespectful.

Yes because they are more experience than their children. Only in fewer cases they may be wrong. You can blame your parents for a lot of things until you have children you will NEVER understand what is means to be a parent.

Some children dont have parents and some parents have abandoned their responsibilities. If you have parents actively in your life, providing for you, advising, scolding and catching your bills. Shut the hell up and be grateful.

These women should be arrested. That's hate speech.

brilapluz:

It was a typo which was too obvious in most of his write-ups!
There was a part where he wrote 'gave' instead of 'grave'!
He already corrected himself that he had a kid not kids!
If it was fictional,he would not contribute to the discussion!

Nope - the context was not a mistake.

The only question I have to ask is when did he give birth to the other kids. I no longer believe Nairaland stories anymore