NewStats: 3,259,452 , 8,170,143 topics. Date: Sunday, 25 May 2025 at 04:37 AM 7293r

Awwwwww so romantic
For me sha "I will tell her to come over,I will sit her down,I will sit down in her front,I will bring out the ring and I will tell her the ring is for her that i want to marry her, and if she agrees she should bring her hand but if she's not interested she should stand up and leave my house. "
Something simple and straightforward.

You're a very messed up individual, either you made up the story up or it is real,you're one messed up individual that needs to be chained and flogged with iroko tree.
What a bad day to know how to read.

Dj! Bring me 1 keg of palmwine, 40 alligator pepper and white cloth I wan curse somebody right now.
Barman! Play me "u no well" by simi and Drake.

This your title is so misleading o
I was already bringing sledgehammer and Ak47 towards your post,ready to attack your neighbour, your neighbour's neighbour,your neighbour's neighbour's neighbour and you wife,until I realise say I no even need bring broom sef.

See people have been crushing on your wife before you got married to her and people will probably still be crushing on her and even on you for some years, but those people are not your problem. It is your wife you have business with.
TELL your wife straightforward that you don't want her getting close or having much conversation with the neighbour, tell her she should reduce it because you're not comfortable.
If your wife start saying it's just conversation and you should trust her,tell her you trust her more than any woman on earth apart from your mum, but it is that guy you don't trust at all.
So she should reduce everything with him and that's final.
Maybe your wife is too open hearted and too jovial that's why she's not seeing that flirty side of your neighbour because normally, she herself suppose don tone down everything herself without you needing to tell her.
Don't listen to any half brain slowpoke that will tell you you're too jealous or anything of sort,na reverse psychology used by those female Sluts and men that go around sleeping with other people's partner.
She's your wife so take charge of your family.

Dj! 2 keg of palmwine for me Make I use reason this matter further
Barman! Play me "Wife palaver" by Wizkid and Rihanna.

I don't know her,she no sabi me too but I hope she wins.
Kemi for prime minister!
Kemi for even minister!
Kemi for odd minister!

Dj! Bring me 4 kegs of palmwine
Barman! Play me "A Queen and More" by Naira Marley and Celine Dion.

Redpiller nonsense? Wow!
Wish you the very best and may everything in your life turn around for good.

Dj! Give Op 1 carton of Palmwine
Barman! Play me "Oh happy day" by Sean Tizzle and Emma Watson.

Lmao! your case is like the bushmeat telling the hunter where to shoot him for quick death.
You want people to love you genuinely and you're telling them about the foreign citizenship and stuff?
Many people will reach out and it won't be because of love but for gains.
I'd suggest ing dating apps and converse normally with the ladies,don't mention anything about foreign citizenship or how desperate you're to get married,just let things flow slowly.
no matter how desperate you are,marrying wrong will make you regret it everything.

Dj! 1 bottle of palmwine for me,2 cup of palmwine for Op.
Barman! Play me "This life sef" by Justin Bieber and Timi dakolo.

Lol Sex for money and Money for sex, and they say they are in serious relationship.

Girls giving their fellow girls Relationship advice
"Look for the highest bidder,sell yourself to him but disguise it with 1 Congo of love, so he will not know it is his money you love and not him."

Guys advising their fellow Guys
"Make money brother,so you can date any girl you want,with money you can off any girls pant"

Taaah! Relationship don turn to partnership and trade by barter business.

Dj! 4 cups of palmwine and 4 plate of tilapia fish
Barman! Play me "this world is going crazy" by Cardi B and Fela.

Why he go marry her,he wan do ritual?
he's even rich already so he no fit do ritual.
Out of the beautiful and matured ladies out there,na 11 years he wan marry?
Lol this cruise get hausa pepper.

Dj! 1 Cup of palmwine jare and mix it with hollandia yoghurt make e thick well well
Barman! Play me "E no fit possible" by Portable and Jumong.

God! Omo this driver don enter big thing o
Rip to the students and may God comfort their family.
Lossing a child is a big nightmare for any parent.
They really need to investigate this matter really really really well.

Another Romeo and Juliet doing something crazy for love, wetin dey worry these people in relationships sef ?

Dj! Abeg 2 Cup of palmwine and 2 plate of peppersoup to celebrate these spiderman and spiderwoman
Barman! Play me "Na so love dey worry people?" By Chris Rock featuring Zuma Rock and Olumo Rock.

I feel for them sha for real
But Face Racism and still get to make money and not be scared of bandits testing Ak47 for your body OR come home to your father's land where you won't face racism but small tribalism and other issues.

Dj! Bring 5 keg of palmwine make I use hold my body,this news dey somehow.
Barman! Play me "Life of a Black man" by Donald Trump and Queen Elizabeth the 1st.

If the enemies like make them simp or not, na their problem.
All those diabolical and wicked enemies, if I fit catch them one on one them go hear am.
If na to wish them poverty, I go wish them Poverty Ultra pro max.
The kind poverty wey them go see money buy rice,them no go see money buy stove,
If dey see money buy stove,them no go see money buy kerosene.
If them see money buy kerosene, them no go see money buy rice and the cycle will continue like that.

Dj! Give 2 bottles of Schnapps, 1 keg of Palmwine, 2 Alligator pepper, the Eyes of Mosquitoes, 42 spider legs and 300 kolanuts I wan use am curse some people.
Barman! Play me "Una go die hard" by Chiwetalu Agu and John Wick.

That same line some of the morons use "he said I will never make it"
Abeg enough of the lies,you're just a rude idiot that made small money and you feel it is time to start insulting people.
Your teachers should be respected especially the primary and secondary ones.
If na you be Obi Cubana or Dangote or Otedola nko? Na to dey write roaster of people you go mock every week.
Roaster for this week "1, My Igwe no allow me date his daughter back then, I go bash am today,
2,my uncle dey always insult me,I go bash am today
3,My friends no give me grasscutter meat one Christmas like that,I go bash them
4,My ex girlfriend called me broke,I go dey bash her every week
5,my primary school heaster flog me 30 strokes because I stole maize and yam,I go bash am since I fit buy him and buy the school"
Better calm down.

Dj! Give me 4 Congo of palmwine to calm myself jare
Barman! Play me "Sit down,Be humble" By HumbleSmith and Will Smith.

This kind of coincidence do occur once in every 5000 years and see how you come waste am ?
Lol I feel you though, it is not everything go be "give me your number" and "can I know you more?" Just normal conversation and parting with good memories is enough.

Dj! Bring me 2 cup of palmwine, 1 for me and 1 for the Op.
Barman! Play me "The strange coincidence" by Doctor Strange and yemi alade.

lexy2014:


Chief priest, you spoke my mind. Pls help us use this meat for the sacrifice

Which kind Meat be this?
This kind meat fit give the gods diarrhoea.

16 kini These ones wan open warehouse?
Anini and oyenusi sef no do reach this one .
Abeg jail their little bumbum after getting back everything they stole.
You still con go use the money lodge? Abeg wey my pump action I wan use am do something quick.

Dj! Bring me 1 knife and 1 cup of palmwine
Barman! Play me "Brown skin criminals" by Rihanna and Portable.

Actually money or success don't change people at all, as long as naturally you're a good person in your heart.
I think you can change either because;
1)you're natural a bad person but you can't carry shoulder up with just #2500 in your , but once you have #10M you can start showing your secondary and primary colour.
2), you can also change if you don see shege from people when you were down,so when money comes you already have the mentality "they are here cause of the money,so why treat them like they are real?"

3), I have another reason but I can't it now,I will sleep over it and type when they bring it.

Dj! Bring me 3 cups of palmwine with enough groundnuts.
Barman! Play me "The Change" by Buhari and Offset.

No real love again na partnership you see between most couples of nowadays.
Sex for money and money for sex is the basics of relationships nowadays.
Also no manners and good home training like back then,everybody trying to form woke and 21st century man or woman .


Dj! 4 cups of palmwine make I use reason further
Barman! Play me "Una never see anything" By Angelique Kidjo and Angelina Jolie

Well if she's for real, no problem.
but if she's using it to trend and for cruise then she should be flog with koboko, so next time her brain will tell her it's not everything you use for your selfish gain.

Dj! Bring me 2 keg of palmwine, 1 for me and one for Aguba of Cuba land.
Barman! Play me "Fame and Fake Love" by Kanye west and Taribo West.

Make all of us dey rush aso rock like this with koboko if the president don dey mess up.
Our politicians over here just too get peace of mind.
That's why somebody will use the country catch cruise,embezzle money,cause insecurity and will still feel safe and happy after his regime knowing nothing will be done to him.

Dj! 400 kegs of palmwine with lucozade boost for these citizens
Barman! Play me "This country is on Fire" by Fireboy and Aquaman.

Bread,with pap and cake? I'm not ing you but enjoy your food
If the bread no get akara,groundnut or beans for side,I no dey .

Dj! 1 plate of Egusi soup with 70 fufu and 2 kegs of Spanish Palmwine
Barman! Play me "Food is life" by Saint Janet and Janet Jackson.

No vex! You too for try collect your share make una go finish the cooking for house .
Normal normal that person that invited you guys deserves to be whooped with strong bamboo stick
Infact if na me the manager sef no go sleep
We go beat each other starting from the 1st floor to the last floor.

Dj! 2 cups of palmwine to cool myself
Barman! Play me"the wedding party" by Desmond tutu and Eminem.

One that woman is a real devil,so the husband has been taking care of kids that are not his own?
Death penalty should be given to this people for real,they're definition of real evil.
Of course she won't tell the husband he's impotent and how is it possible for a man to be impotent and he won't know?
I pity that man o,he's loosing both at home and away.

Dj! 1 keg of palmwine because ordinary eyes no fit reason the matter
Barman! Play me "na life be this?" By Manchester United Fc featuring Tiwa Savage.

I'm thinking about food,crypto and skills,
E no that one

Dj! 4 cups of sweet palmwine with 2 catfish to reason this post wella
Barman! Play me "The overthinker" by Albert Einstein and Buhari.

I go call one person to come and answer your snakish question.

All welcome Uncle Lalaaaa the father of python,
The python king on the iron throne,
The slithering and venomous king himself,
The elder brother of king lala of opobo
We hail thee!

We summon thee to help us answer this riddle
What shall we tell Op?
What is the name of the snake?
What is the name of the animal the snake killed?
Should Op consume this scary snake or throw it away?
Should Op be scared of the wife coming for revenge?
Should Op leave his house and run?
Help us oh great lala!

Dj! Ready 7 kegs of palmwine incase Op wan give us location for peppersoup
Barman! Play me "Snake in antelope shadow " by Kim Jong un and Obasanjo.

If them don invite Sars come knock sense into his head, he for no dey do like Bruce Lee but I guess he's the only fighter in your family.
Somebody wey you go knack 2by2 for mouth make 27 teeth comot with force.

Tell your people to go and buy real gun make them shoot the ghost again, all these walking dead tale go end ASAP.

Dj! 1 plate of palmwine with 2 cups of peppersoup to read reason this story further
Barman! Play me "Dead man walking" by 2pac and 2face.

I get coconut head! I no dey hear word!


Dj! 4 cups of palmwine with peak milk
Barman! Play me "Thunder fire you" By Ed Sheeran and Awilo.

Lol first of all, I don't think you're an igbo man.
Also don't take the tribalist animals on nairaland seriously, some of them just need brain check up and good food that's all.
Coming online to bash people of other tribes and yet condemning racism in other countries,is that not sign of premature madness?
Don't take any of the comment to heart,just avoid the animals. Once they share the will of their daddy and they can get small money and 1 house from it you will see they will get busy with their lives.
Na hunger dey fuel their rage.

Dj! Abeg 4 cups of palmwine, banga soup,strong eba and put 80 meats make I use am see front wella.
Barman! Play me "Black man problem" by Segun Arinze and Beyonce.

Because you have #1 billion does not mean you will be kind, even if it is #1000 you have you will still give part of it out once you're a kind person.
Good one by Mr spellz
May God bless both of them abundantly

Dj! Bring me 4 cups of palmwine and isi-ewu to celebrate this new friendship
Barman! Play me "A friend with weed, is a friend indeed." By Burna boy and Jose Mourinho.

It goes both ways o
Some men will go after that girl that will keep hurting them and some ladies go after men that will make tears gum their eye lashes together.
Maybe it is the thrilling effect those people have on them,I no sabi.
You know normal is boring so maybe they love that feeling of weird adventures with them.
In the book of metal,elements and composition written by Julius Agwu in 2023,he said and I quote "Like charges repel and unlike charges attract" e mean say good people dey love bad people sometimes.

Dj! 5 cups of palmwine to reason this topic further.
Barman! Play me "Lovers dey cry" by Mr Ibu and Rihanna.

Op you sure say na local yam or imported yam?
If na imported yam you know they will have to pay some fees maybe na why the thing expensive BUT if na local yam be this, it is time to move to the next country.
They said your yam looks cute though,maybe you should enroll the yam in a fashion academy.

Dj! Bring me 1 plate of palmwine with 2 cups of fufu to reason this yam matter
Barman! Play me "the cute yam" by yemi alade and Ed Sheeran.

Wow! Congratulations to you people
This is a good news

Dj! 40 kegs of palmwine and dish it out to me,the couple, the op and other nairalanders.
Barman! Play me "day of joy" by Cardi B and Adekunle Gold.