NewStats: 3,261,193 , 8,173,352 topics. Date: Wednesday, 28 May 2025 at 02:09 PM j6562

Gamesmart:


Even when the economy was better than this, why 4 kids?

Why 1? Why 3? Why 8? Why 20? How many siblings do you have? Why?

Gerrard59:


Typical Buharist.

Buhari will handle sehkurity, while Osinbajo will handle the heconomy.

I'm sure that you always had alternative candidates that you preferred, it wasn't my fault that you guys didn't have enough votes to pull it off. Loser!

4
2m and 2f.

For me oo na just 3

Foe me na just 3 children

maasoap:

Why 1? Why 3? Why 8? Why 20? How many siblings do you have? Why?

Because a small amount makes sense.

I have only 1 sibling.

But even if I had more than 1 sibling, this is the 21st century, not the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s where the world was less crowded, more countries were resilient (including Nigeria), you did not need expensive technologies like laptops, smart mobile phones, internet connections etc. to be competent enough educationally to compete in the world and Nigerian public universities were competent enough.

So why would you have 4 or 20 children in this modern age?

Why could you not have maximum 2 or, at the very worst, 3?

Wetin children go chop for earth Dey follow them from heaven.... as many as possible
12 maybe

They just left the room …. They know themselves

Zonefree:
Marriage with a Nigerian girl is vain!

Go get a job and keep yourself busy. stop sounding like a bitter loser.

Just 2 and if economy situation improves may be just may be 3.




Zip up now na by force oooo

1



Max 2 with like 5 to 7 yrs gap

Gamesmart:


Because a small amount makes sense.

I have only 1 sibling.

We heard, only you know the truth.

But even if I had more than 1 sibling, this is the 21st century, not the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s where the world was less crowded, more countries were resilient (including Nigeria), you did not need expensive technologies like laptops, smart mobile phones, internet connections etc . to be competent enough educationally to compete in the world and Nigerian public universities were competent enough.

You could still have one or two kids and not being able to afford those items. So, if you can afford it for your 4 or 8 kids, that would still be better than those with one or two kids who still can't afford it.

So why would you have 4 or 20 children in this modern age?

Why not? What's happened to "modern age"?

Why could you not have maximum 2 or, at the very worst, 3?

When you get married, you will understand why two becomes three or why maximum of 3 becomes 4.

Jewessgratitud3:
Considering the harsh economic conditions, if you happen to marry today, how many children will you have knowing the current istration is still going to last for the another four years. Will you plan the number of children you're having around the tenure or are you going to just have them as they come with hope for a better economy in the future?

This also applies to the newly married who just had one. How far? Una wan go for second one in this regime? Why?

Im not talking now based on your current financial status. Just looking at the economy, which would you go for A or B?

Share your sincere thoughts on this.


Let me set the ball rolling.
If I happen to marry today, hubby and I will have to reach a solid agreement to have only one child for now then wait and see what happens after four years to decide if we are having more or closing shop. . This is my honest opinion.

Am having four children, 1 after three years.

2 original and back up periodt

10 from one woman by God's grace

Jewessgratitud3:


Be careful what you say now. You might just end up with one the next minute and it will be too late to reverse what you just said.

Maybe you need to change the circle you go to meet girls.

abegi you all the same material lovers lol

Two is okay for me and I will take care of them well.

Three=2 boys & 1 girl.

Let me find out from Mynd44

Jewessgratitud3:
.
Correct!!!! I like you jare!


Ok. According to your financial capacity. So if you have the wherewithal to go for 20 children, you'll go ahead? Ok.

Sure but would be hurting that woman do u think asinine woman can carry 20 babies

Just 2

maasoap:

We heard, only you know the truth.

I am telling you the truth.

And even if I was not, you can not compare back in the day to today.

maasoap:

You could still have one or two kids and not being able to afford those items. So, if you can afford it for your 4 or 8 kids, that would still be better than those with one or two kids who still can't afford it.

This is quite a lame point.

It is like me telling you that people in Denmark live a better life than Nigerians, and your response is that "Those living in Banana Island are better off than people in Denmark".

Dangote is free to have 100 children, that does not make it okay for you to have 8 .......except you are telling me you are an ED of a Tier 1 Bank.

maasoap:

Why not? What's happened to "modern age"?

When you get married, you will understand why two becomes three or why maximum of 3 becomes 4.

It is surprising many Nigerians (especially the stuupid pastors) talk about being a married man and raising a family makes one "mature" and "responsible".

In sensible reality, a responsible man (or woman) should only bring a child into the world if this man has reasonably secured a means and long-term path for taking care of the child to at least a socially competitive level. Being responsible is not just by procreating. Wild beasts can do it too.

What is socially competitive?

Socially competitive is when one can reasonably compete in his or her world to be able to live at least an average middle-class life with no-to-minimal suffering.

So, for every child a responsible person creates, he or she must have secured a means and long-term path for taking care of the child to live a good life.

What does it cost to almost ensure that a child in Nigeria today grows up to be prepared for the world of the future, be competitive and live a good life?

The parents have to be able to provide the following:

- A nice and secure roof over their heads. There should be no need to worry too much about insecurity and they should be able to mix with decent humans that have prospects from a young age. So, if you live in Lagos, you should ideally be living in neighbourhoods like Surulere, Festac Town, Yaba, Ajah or neighbourhoods above these standards.

- You should be able to send them to schools that would prepare them well for the future. Now, public schools in Nigeria are nothing to write home about, so you are looking at decent private schools like St. Gregory’s College, Wellspring College, Lifeforte etc. that cost like 1.0m to 2.5m per child per annum to ensure they are well-equipped for the next stages of their lives and not be another LeonSaab.

- While at these schools, you will have to equip them with decent amount of electricity, laptops and access to internet.

- When they finish there, you want to send them to, at least, Top Nigerian public universities like UI, OAU, Unilag, UNN, ABU, Unilorin etc. or top private ones like Covenant, ABUAD, Pan-Atlantic, Babcock, Bowen etc. If you are sending them to a public university, you should be ready to pay good money for off-campus accommodation so they don't live in the pigsty hostels not fit for human habitation. These places would cost you about N700K to N2.5m per annum per child. You might also need to upgrade their gadgets by this time as those would be outdated.

- When they finish from Nigerian universities, most likely, it would make sense for them to go abroad for their masters. Preferably in UK, USA or Canada; but, at worst, in Ireland, South Africa, Cyprus, Turkey etc. These places would be costing you in the range of 12m+ per child for a one year masters.

- This is apart from the decent balanced diet meals to feed them daily and solidify their brain functions. And, if you want to be even better, at least take them on two overseas trips before they are 18 to make them both more exposed and be confident in society.

These are what it takes to build and almost guarantee a child in Nigeria today good prospects/chance of being competitive and not suffering in life in future.

Are you telling us that you have the secured a means and long-term path to deliver these to all your 4 children?

Worse still, I don't know the age gaps of your kids, but have you secured a means and long-term path to deliver these to all 4 children if they are all in secondary school or university at the same time?

Or how close to these standards can you provide for your 4 kids?

I am talking about reality on ground o, not delusional hopes and dependence on God's miracle/divine intervention/prayers?

All those thinking of having more than 2 children, should tomorrow u won't be alive and what ll happen to those children?
We 7 in number, i always warning my mom after the 5th born to stop giving birth as the current situation in Nigeria isn't going to improve but ll get worst.
After the 7th child, we lost our dad. In 2017 she lost her teaching job and at that time, I'm the only graduate. From that moment till now, I'm the one shouldering the responsibility of my siblings. 4 of them are currently in the university. u can imagine how some parents can be wicked and insensitive.

akaahs:
All those thinking of having more than 2 children, should tomorrow u won't be alive and what ll happen to those children?
We 7 in number, i always warning my mom after the 5th born to stop giving birth as the current situation in Nigeria isn't going to improve but ll get worst.
After the 7th child, we lost our dad. In 2017 she lost her teaching job and at that time, I'm the only graduate. From that moment till now, I'm the one shouldering the responsibility of my siblings. 4 of them are currently in the university. u can imagine how some parents can be wicked and insensitive.

I understand how you feel and I hope 2024 will be better for you financially. I too have been in a similar situation since 2020 even though my parents are still alive. Very little savings, no investment, very little spending on myself. The painful part is that, given another opportunity, our parents will still make the same mistake, as most of them don't even regret their actions to begin with, as they are always excusing it away with some religious shits like "kids are a blessing from God," "a child brings what (s)he will eat from heaven," or that "God said we should be fruitful and multiply." And this is not even the most painful or shocking.

I have engaged a parent who has three sickle cell kids. First, I wanted to know if she wasn't aware of genotype. Next, I tried to know if she wasn't aware that her first child was a warrior, and why she didn't stop. It turns out she was aware of the genotype mismatch and was also aware her first daughter carries the disease. The only reason she gave for her decision is her strong believe in her God and her believe in miracles. She even told me a concorted story of a man whose genotype changed from SS to AA after an encounter with one of their god of men.

Enough is not said of the damage religion has done but any attempt to raise this discussion is often met with attacks from those who are profiting from it. Religion has taking away the ability of grown adults to think logically/disionately and take responsibility for their actions. So far I have not met anybody with plan for a huge family whose decision is not informed by/hinged on religion. And this is not as if these folks are even financially capable to begin with.

sammiewrite:
I understand how you feel and I hope 2024 will be better for you financially. I too have been in a similar situation since 2020 even though my parents are still alive. Very little savings, no investment, very little spending on myself. The painful part is that, given another opportunity, our parents will still make the same mistake, as most of them don't even regret their actions to begin with, as they are always excusing it away with some religious shits like "kids are a blessing from God," "a child brings what (s)he will eat from heaven," or that "God said we should be fruitful and multiply." And this is not even the most painful or shocking.

I have engaged a parent who has three sickle cell kids. First, I wanted to know if she wasn't aware of genotype. Next, I tried to know if she wasn't aware that her first child was a warrior, and why she didn't stop. It turns out she was aware of the genotype mismatch and was also aware her first daughter carries the disease. The only reason she gave for her decision is her strong believe in her God and her believe in miracles. She even told me a concorted story of a man whose genotype changed from SS to AA after an encounter with one of their god of men.

Enough is not said of the damage religion has done but any attempt to raise this discussion is often met with attacks from those who are profiting from it. Religion has taking away the ability of grown adults to think logically/disionately and take responsibility for their actions. So far I have not met anybody with plan for a huge family whose decision is not informed by/hinged on religion. And this is not as if these folks are even financially capable to begin with.

U just described a typical African parents.
Just imagine my rebuked me when i ever i said I'm not gonna two children, telling me God has been the one feeding and taking care of us all these while.
Just crazy!

akaahs:
All those thinking of having more than 2 children, should tomorrow u won't be alive and what ll happen to those children?
We 7 in number, i always warning my mom after the 5th born to stop giving birth as the current situation in Nigeria isn't going to improve but ll get worst.
After the 7th child, we lost our dad. In 2017 she lost her teaching job and at that time, I'm the only graduate. From that moment till now, I'm the one shouldering the responsibility of my siblings. 4 of them are currently in the university. u can imagine how some parents can be wicked and insensitive.

Una dey see?

maasoap.

sammiewrite:
I understand how you feel and I hope 2024 will be better for you financially. I too have been in a similar situation since 2020 even though my parents are still alive. Very little savings, no investment, very little spending on myself. The painful part is that, given another opportunity, our parents will still make the same mistake, as most of them don't even regret their actions to begin with, as they are always excusing it away with some religious shits like "kids are a blessing from God," "a child brings what (s)he will eat from heaven," or that "God said we should be fruitful and multiply." And this is not even the most painful or shocking.

I have engaged a parent who has three sickle cell kids. First, I wanted to know if she wasn't aware of genotype. Next, I tried to know if she wasn't aware that her first child was a warrior, and why she didn't stop. It turns out she was aware of the genotype mismatch and was also aware her first daughter carries the disease. The only reason she gave for her decision is her strong believe in her God and her believe in miracles. She even told me a concorted story of a man whose genotype changed from SS to AA after an encounter with one of their god of men.

Enough is not said of the damage religion has done but any attempt to raise this discussion is often met with attacks from those who are profiting from it. Religion has taking away the ability of grown adults to think logically/disionately and take responsibility for their actions. So far I have not met anybody with plan for a huge family whose decision is not informed by/hinged on religion. And this is not as if these folks are even financially capable to begin with.

My freaking bleeping GOD!

WTF?

akaahs:

U just described a typical African parents.
Just imagine my rebuked me when i ever i said I'm not gonna two children, telling me God has been the one feeding and taking care of us all these while.
Just crazy!

And the useless religious dead-brain people would be the one saying being married and having children is the measure of being "responsible".

onuman:

Don't say that to northern Nigerians.
Breeding children in mass is means for them to get more states and local government areas from Nigeria for bigger shares in oil revenues.

Worse, Nigerians, especially those from the south, don't understand that population or land mass is not considered when creating states in a country formed by different regions. That's how northern military dictators sewed states and local government areas like seeds in the northern region but left fewer states and local government areas for the two southern regions.

Nigeria's North have more population than the South.

Nigeria's North's land mass is twice that of the South.

So why should the North not have more local government areas and states?

Free2Fly:


I've 4 cute boys and i'm capable of taking care of them

Chikel20000:
3-4 is enough for me

babajero:
4 (2 boys and 2 girls).

TheMostComplex1:

Four
2 boys & 2 girls

Olaolex:
3 ni ooo
If God wills, 4 at most

Waffarianman:
4,5 children 3kids down already. With God all things are possible

greenermodels:
3-4 kids is my ideal.

You are able to do all these for them?

Gamesmart:

It is surprising many Nigerians (especially the stuupid pastors) talk about being a married man and raising a family makes one "mature" and "responsible".

In sensible reality, a responsible man (or woman) should only bring a child into the world if this man has reasonably secured a means and long-term path for taking care of the child to at least a socially competitive level. Being responsible is not just by procreating. Wild beasts can do it too.

What is socially competitive?

Socially competitive is when one can reasonably compete in his or her world to be able to live at least an average middle-class life with no-to-minimal suffering.

So, for every child a responsible person creates, he or she must have secured a means and long-term path for taking care of the child to live a good life.

What does it cost to almost ensure that a child in Nigeria today grows up to be prepared for the world of the future, be competitive and live a good life?

The parents have to be able to provide the following:

- A nice and secure roof over their heads. There should be no need to worry too much about insecurity and they should be able to mix with decent humans that have prospects from a young age. So, if you live in Lagos, you should ideally be living in neighbourhoods like Surulere, Festac Town, Yaba, Ajah or neighbourhoods above these standards.

- You should be able to send them to schools that would prepare them well for the future. Now, public schools in Nigeria are nothing to write home about, so you are looking at decent private schools like St. Gregory’s College, Wellspring College, Lifeforte etc. that cost like 1.0m to 2.5m per child per annum to ensure they are well-equipped for the next stages of their lives and not be another LeonSaab.

- While at these schools, you will have to equip them with decent amount of electricity, laptops and access to internet.

- When they finish there, you want to send them to, at least, Top Nigerian public universities like UI, OAU, Unilag, UNN, ABU, Unilorin etc. or top private ones like Covenant, ABUAD, Pan-Atlantic, Babcock, Bowen etc. If you are sending them to a public university, you should be ready to pay good money for off-campus accommodation so they don't live in the pigsty hostels not fit for human habitation. These places would cost you about N700K to N2.5m per annum per child. You might also need to upgrade their gadgets by this time as those would be outdated.

- When they finish from Nigerian universities, most likely, it would make sense for them to go abroad for their masters. Preferably in UK, USA or Canada; but, at worst, in Ireland, South Africa, Cyprus, Turkey etc. These places would be costing you in the range of 12m+ per child for a one year masters.

- This is apart from the decent balanced diet meals to feed them daily and solidify their brain functions. And, if you want to be even better, at least take them on two overseas trips before they are 18 to make them both more exposed and be confident in society.

These are what it takes to build and almost guarantee a child in Nigeria today good prospects/chance of being competitive and not suffering in life in future.

Are you telling us that you have the secured a means and long-term path to deliver these to all your 4 children?

Worse still, I don't know the age gaps of your kids, but have you secured a means and long-term path to deliver these to all 4 children if they are all in secondary school or university at the same time?

Or how close to these standards can you provide for your 4 kids?

I am talking about reality on ground o, not delusional hopes and dependence on God's miracle/divine intervention/prayers?

Dancebreaker:

I had female friend who said many years ago that she would have minimum 4 kids. She had no steady bf. Although she claimed no bf but you know ladies are not honest in such matters.
I advised that she should wait and agree that with her future hubby. She insisted it must be minimum 4 kids by fire by force. I just siddon look.

She married some years later.
She knack one pikin fiam! Like another 18 months, another pikin fiam!

Nor do nor do, a third pikin fiam!

Well, the hubby insisted on not having a third child but she did everything to have it. I only found out when the hubby began to avoid coming home until very late at night and marital problems started.

She is a single mother now.

Lovely!