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I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor (60769 Views)
GT07115: 12:17pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
HitSong:well she is not naive as u think and to put the record straight I am the third guy she will be dating, I can count the number of ladies I have messed up with where, when and how it happened to this very moment , I am not a sex freak I was celibate for good 3 years without a woman no joke. When u talk about older ladies I laugh, older ladies who is either a graduate or self dependent I have come across are not submissive and ready to learn or take advice that will even better their lives, those who are graduate don't want to learn a trade to be self reliant rather they want to do business or secure a job they have no knowledge of. When I approached her I thought she was in her twenties but I was surprised to get the opposite and to me is a perfect age I love, I don't want old cargoes, I want a woman I can look at in 20 years from now I will still have an erection, sex is 80 percent in marriage and anything that will keep that fired burning to me is welcome and age is one of it. So don't take me for a sex starve man or an opportunist, I want her for a wife not sex machine, I am only disturb because humans are unpredictable and I don't have the financial muscles owing to other families responsibility. 23 Likes 1 Share |
ibkayee(f): 12:28pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
I find the age gap between the two of you creepy because of how young she is but she’s technically legal I guess and if she’s ok with it, you two should flourish. I have a feeling she’s going to dump you once you put her through school/start a trade for her and she sharpens up lol. Same way you’re probably taking advantage of her naivety and financial situation now to some extent (not necessarily saying you don’t love her) is the way she may take advantage of the help you’re about to provide her, she may not be thinking that way now but give it a few years lol. I could be wrong, it’s just an inkling after all. Good luck either way ![]() 18 Likes 1 Share |
spongeisback: 12:29pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
So your 18 years old girlfriend won't get older ![]() ![]() GT07115: 18 Likes 5 Shares |
GT07115: 12:36pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
generationz: I rarely appreciate ur mature candid submissions, we still have mature minds here. The plan I have before now was to let her finish her exams secure the ission in the polytechnic we applied for, even secured a place where she can learn fashion deg, she will be going there after her classes, then start marriage arrangements with her to make the whole stuff formal. On her part she has been really worried that her parents can't contribute and placing the burden on me is what she doesn't like, if she had known she would have refused me buying jamb for her instead learn a trade, I love my woman to be educated, to me the school fees is not a problem at least to securing her ND first. Will all this financial commitment be deducted during bride payments lol � just wondering, because the parents are no doing enough for just two females children they have, though I put myself through school I am still coming up no stable means of income but we are good, for now business can feed and pay bills. 2 Likes |
GT07115: 12:55pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
aanuoluwami14:I have been hustling all my life, I hustle legitimately to put my self through school, I am still hustling, should I continue hustling without thinking of having a family? Should I be thinking of that in my fourthies? I am even behind time now maritally, I have dated a girl who I was supposed to settle down with during my service year, she is a fashion designer, she is making money on a daily basis but then I don't look at her money, I was even richer than she was then I even spend more on her than someone who is not working, she was totally a misfit thank God it didn't came through, I would have regretted it. So bro I am not looking at her financial status rather just want a way of making her more valuable while she becomes my wife owning to financial constraints. 1 Like |
GT07115: 1:01pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
coldFLARES1:should it be about one's financial status when choosing a woman to settle with? U sound utopian and this thinking of urs will only bring u misery rather than joy maritally. I was ones thinking like u to get a girl whose parents are well to do financially, but it only gives room to ego, self centeredness, without recourse to love and the basis on which marriage foundation should be laid. What is wrong in building ur woman if u can? 1 Like |
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 1:04pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Kendumazy:Best advice |
Mcslize: 1:54pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
HitSong: I don't think 30 years old guy is too old for an 18years old girl approaching 19. Most of these girls, you see these days are so mature in body. You might not even think she is 18. Like me: I have told myself that I won't marry my mate. Most of the ladies that are 30years old I have seen are like my 45 years old aunty. Sometimes, I noticed that my aunty is even way younger than some of them and this makes me feel, what will happen if I get married to my mate? She will definitely look way too older in appearance even if I am older than her with 1 to 2 years. As a guy in his early 30's as the Op, I won't even marry a girl I am older than with 3 years let alone a mate. If I am 30, I would comfortably marry a girl I am older than with 10 years gap. If a girl I am older than with 5 years comes my way, and she is up and well doing, I might reconsider. But in all, I should be older than my wife with 6 -10 years gap due to the fast maturation that ladies undergo. 15 Likes 1 Share |
babyfaceafrica: 2:11pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
HitSong:what age did omotola,KANU wife and bianca ojukwu got married? 9 Likes |
Rita30: 2:16pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Skmoda360: OMG Your brain must be paining you. You have comprehension issues You need to be mental hospital asap 1 Like |
coldFLARES1(m): 2:22pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
GT07115:I don't have the time to check what 'utopian' means, but you may need to be aware that i have successfully navigated 2 yrs, that has been blessed with a pretty 13 months old cutie, in a marital union. ..and this is not to someone with the best credentials. Love, I have discovered is just the ingredient that would buy time for a marriage facing turbulence and not the foundation as you have stated. That should be the reason why marriages lasted longer in the days of yore. To get married, the right boxes should be ticked:including, but not limited to maturity, family background, genotype. Maturity so she doesn't wear you down with her foolish/childish decisions, unrealistic expectations and erratic behaviors. Family background so you don't have to be burden with catering to basic responsibities of in-laws when you should be growing in your union and laying the bricks for a successful life. Overall, it is your decision to make and I only have a duty, as an egbon, to advice and then wish you well. 16 Likes 2 Shares |
pansophist(m): 2:24pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Kendumazy: Op listen to the guy. |
Jollof123: 2:29pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
HitSong: Did he tell you the girl is a virgin before they meet? Don't you know 13 years old girl are even getting pregnant now adays? Don't you know that if OP didn't have good intention towards the girl he won't pay for her jamb and neco talkless of bringing it to nairaland? Don't you think a girl with a poor background whose parent don't care about are movement and are not ready to spansor her to school is prone to b used by diff guys of nowadays ? How many slay queen who are 20+ get brain self nowadays? OP...meet her parents and discuss marriage proposal with them. If they agreed then marry her. Let her start a business or let her learn a trade first. Then schooling should follow. But if you are financially bouyant then marry her and sponsor her schooling till she is able to handle business. 9 Likes 1 Share |
united442(m): 2:46pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Deepfeel: o.p listen to this guy.... you see that word "exposure" ![]() immediately she gets that, VOOOOOMMM!!!!.... you start hearing stuff like "does years we where together was a waste."..to actually show she's still or was still blind then.. o.p that babe nvr start life oooooohhh! she's jst an adult by age but is she's mentally an adult ![]() 6 Likes |
Skmoda360(m): 3:10pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Rita30:Ode ni eh....na you no sabi comprehend.....read what you wrote. No iota of sense in it....capiche!!! |
biz2get(m): 3:17pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
What ever you choose to do. Just get ready to learn the HARD WAY.?! |
rex444(m): 3:21pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
menvocate:you have said it all....I had wanted to tell him not to wail when she does what they do best but iji okwu my bro 1 Like |
Rita30: 3:27pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Skmoda360: You are a frustrated mentally deranged nicumpuc They are always the first to throw stones 2 Likes |
SEGLIZ: 3:33pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
GT07115: first is she mannered? if yes, then you are good. go economical about this, I mean put everyone one on scale of preference, of which she would last but first. what I mean above is your siblings comes first in of education while she comes last. where she comes first is you establishing her while the proceed of the business would be strictly to finance her education under your supervision. 1 Like |
generationz(f): 4:20pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
GT07115:Then it is good you ask her how much bride price costs in her place If the family isn't a greedy one and marriage isn't too expensive you both can do intro and small traditional wedding. Then after you guys are financially stable you do white wedding. If she is Yoruba you don't have a problem. Family will be all too willing to contribute and they don't bill their inlaws The parents should be able to consider your pocket as youlld be doing them a favour by taking care of one of their kids. I still believe you should marry her first ( small wedding) before commuting yourself to train her. Many rich IBO men do this. Its very risky training a girlfriend or fiancée through school. That OND you think is small, she can meet a new young guy who will sweep her off her feet and all your investments will just go to waste. Exposure changes people no matter how good. Since you can take care of her schooling no problem . Also make sure this girl loves you really and understands what she is getting into. What marriage is about. Some very young girls mistake gratitude for love . When a man comes to take them out of poverty like this they think they love him but they are just grateful. Until they meet a guy that makes their heart pound and takes their breath away . Many won't mind walking away . 15 Likes 2 Shares |
Mcslize: 4:49pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
ibkayee: Not every one loves marrying their age mates. I am one of them like the Op. Women age faster than men. I have noticed that most of the ladies I am older than even with 2 to 3 years always look way older than I am. Yes they look way older in appearance. An instance was when one nairalands shared his prewedding pics, instead of wishing the guy happy marrisge life, majority of persons were asking if the lady was her aunty cuz she looks older and the guy appeared younger in facial appearance. We are not talking about Regina and Ned here. A guy of 30 wanting to settle down with a lady of 18 approaching 19, I see nothing wrong in that. Mind you, the girl is aging every minute that es by. The way she looks today won't be how she will look next year, don't forget. 6 Likes 1 Share |
ibkayee(f): 4:54pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Mcslize:Lol a 30 year old trying to get with an 18 year old is creepy to me. Periodt 7 Likes |
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 4:58pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
elantraceey:in essence you want him to put someone else's daughter to subjugation and poverty so you can claim man of the house. Op, there is no pressure to marry, if you are complaining about bills then you are not as financially. stable as you would have us believe. Sending her to school is something you ought to do because you want to with no strings attached, not because you want to marry her, if you marry her now, she won't have enough experiences to upgrade her life, she will always be your shadow. But then that is what you want. If you can't wait for her to mature a little, then you don't really love her at all. let her choose you, don't pressurize her 18 Likes 3 Shares |
Mcslize: 5:07pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
ibkayee: 18 years old girl na madam o. Forget about the age and look at it from the body stature aspect, you will be shocked how matured they look in figure and posture. I once saw a girl of 19 years. First, I thought she would be around 25 to 27. But I was shocked when she said she was 19. I opened my mouth for like 60 seconds I no gree close am due to how surprised I was. From that day, I never judge a girl by her figure. 1 Like |
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 5:17pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Ahmed0336:The same thing my own father sit me down to advise me last Month. . |
badadvice(f): 5:18pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Mcslize: same here man. I intend to get married at 28-30. I already have eyes set on a 16 yrs old young lady in my area. I'm literally only waiting for her to turn nineteen (cos by then i'll be 28) before i throw my hook. I cant come and marry a lady that will turn unappealing when she clocks 40 while i'm just 45 and still agile. 7 Likes 1 Share |
ibkayee(f): 5:20pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
Mcslize:I’m talking about her mental maturity, not her body lol and this is the problem. She’s technically an adult but she still has a lot of mental development and experiences to go through compared to a 30 year old. Anyway, shebi I said they should flourish lol 3 Likes |
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 5:33pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
elantraceey: Same Igbo people that are insulting Hausa/Fulani of early marriage 2 Likes |
elantraceey(f): 5:37pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
ladiesreject: There's a difference please, theirs is consensual , the ladies actually want to get married unlike the Hausa that gives out their daughters without the daughters consent. 1 Like |
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 5:44pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
elantraceey: Who told you they don't consent to it? Have you ever seen a Hausa/Fulani girl that said she was forced into a marriage? Or you talk base on the fake news you mostly read online? Am not a Muslim or Hausa, but the way the southerners insult their northern counterparts, you'll think they are not also guilty of this same act. It's wrong for a 15 years old to get married but it's not wrong for a 15 years old to fvck different d!cks, that's according to the southerners. Hypocrites everywhere. 8 Likes |
elantraceey(f): 5:48pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
ladiesreject: I have an Hausa lady friend that was married off at 14 and trust me you wouldn't want any lady in your life to go through what she have been through . Everyone is entitled to how they want to live their lives as long as they're hurting nobody , just don't force or decieve people into what they'll regret later. 2 Likes |
Jollof123: 6:11pm On Jun 06, 2019 |
elantraceey: We need proof and witnesses... |
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