NewStats: 3,264,087 , 8,182,557 topics. Date: Monday, 09 June 2025 at 03:51 PM 22115k

This story is personal to me and want others to learn from it.
I met my first love during my 3rd year as an undergraduate in 2006. We dated for 5 years. Between the five years, I went for my youth service in the far-North. I came back in January , 2010 after my nysc. My relationship with this lady waxed stronger until one day in 2011, my Pastor told me I will not marry this lady. Pls note that this lady is my first love and I'm also her first love. I was told to inform this lady that my Pastor will not permit me to marry her. Afterwards, I informed her and she thought it was a prank. It wasn't easy for me. I have to move on. This lady waited for me for eight good years, not married that I will come back for her. After sometimes, all the men this lady met, she didn't like them except me. In the long run, her parents and family started abusing her and she left her family house for Lagos. She met a single father, far older than her because she's almost clocking 40 years as of that time. She got pregnant for him, thinking the man will go and pay her dowry and marry her. The lady gave birth and the man abandoned her with her child. In 2023, we reconnected back and she didn't tell me until I persuaded her. Now, she's a single mother, staying with her parents. I felt so bad that I wished I never met her before. If I didn't have any relationship with her, she should be happily married now cos I waisted the most important years of her life. I informed her to let me pay her dowry, and get her back into my life. This is how some ladies got into single motherhood. That's why I blame some and I don't blame some. The story is too sketchy. I will continue another day.

1.
What is your pastor's reason for going against the planned marriage?

2.
Now that you want to pay her bride price, is your pastor in of the idea?

immortalcrown:
1.
What is your pastor's reason for going against the planned marriage?

2.
Now that you want to pay her bride price, is your pastor in of the idea?

Thanks for the question.
1. Till date, he didn't tell me the reason.
2. I won't let him know. Cos if she didn't meet me in the first instance, she won't be in this mess now. I surely believe if it's another person she met in 2006, she will be happily married now with children and will be doing fine. The action has destabilized her career and things are not that easy for her. She only takes care of the child and the man has abandoned her.

immortalcrown:
1.
What is your pastor's reason for going against the planned marriage?

2.
Now that you want to pay her bride price, is your pastor in of the idea?

The last time we met, she ultered a statement that she supposed to be enjoying now with me cos she has seen what I have, where I work (with good pay). She's no more herself. I just pitied her which made me to conclude and pay her dowry. My parents most not hear that she's now a single mother because they won't be happy as a result of not marrying her and her parents pushing her to marry by all means cos she's approaching 40 as at then

You, are you married now or u also remained single the whole time?
Marrying out of pity isnt right as well
Inasmuch as i understand the way u feel considering her position & sacrifice

Pray first o!
Tis well

So your pastor told you not to marry her and didn't give you any reason for that.
You dumped her after wasting her vital years.

You are one of those that worship their pastors.

I hope you are now married to the right woman that your so-called pastor wants you to marry?
Shame on you.

Kelvin247Gold:
This story is personal to me and want others to learn from it.
I met my first love during my 3rd year as an undergraduate in 2006. We dated for 5 years. Between the five years, I went for my youth service in the far-North. I came back in January , 2010 after my nysc. My relationship with this lady waxed stronger until one day in 2011, my Pastor told me I will not marry this lady. Pls note that this lady is my first love and I'm also her first love. I was told to inform this lady that my Pastor will not permit me to marry her. Afterwards, I informed her and she thought it was a prank. It wasn't easy for me. I have to move on. This lady waited for me for eight good years, not married that I will come back for her. After sometimes, all the men this lady met, she didn't like them except me. In the long run, her parents and family started abusing her and she left her family house for Lagos. She met a single father, far older than her because she's almost clocking 40 years as of that time. She got pregnant for him, thinking the man will go and pay her dowry and marry her. The lady gave birth and the man abandoned her with her child. In 2023, we reconnected back and she didn't tell me until I persuaded her. Now, she's a single mother, staying with her parents. I felt so bad that I wished I never met her before. If I didn't have any relationship with her, she should be happily married now cos I waisted the most important years of her life. I informed her to let me pay her dowry, and get her back into my life. This is how some ladies got into single motherhood. That's why I blame some and I don't blame some. The story is too sketchy. I will continue another day.

No one gives a fûck about your lame ass story being sketchy. Since you can't decide as a man who to marry and rely on a pastor to tell you what to do, just cut off your balls too and give the pastor as dowry.

Religion has colonized your cerebellum.😡

Kelvin247Gold:


The last time we met, she ultered a statement that she supposed to be enjoying now with me cos she has seen what I have, where I work (with good pay). She's no more herself. I just pitied her which made me to conclude and pay her dowry. My parents most not hear that she's now a single mother because they won't be happy as a result of not marrying her and her parents pushing her to marry by all means cos she's approaching 40 as at then

So in a nutshell you are marrying her out of pity/sympathy

Omo Ur pastor bleeped up big time....choose a wife ursef, don't allow any religious leader to do that for u..

Some pastors can cause problems...

This particular guy don't love that lady at the time.. cuz if u do.. no yeye pastor in the world can stop u from going ahead...

U are the problem only blamshifting to a pastor... See how he said easily.. I moved on.. and we reconnected.. as if the lady got lost

blacksam01:
This particular guy don't love that lady at the time.. cuz if u do.. no yeye pastor in the world can stop u from going ahead...

U are the problem only blamshifting to a pastor... See how he said easily.. I moved on.. and we reconnected.. as if the lady got lost

You are right

There was no love from his own side

Kelvin247Gold:


Thanks for the question.
1. Till date, he didn't tell me the reason.
2. I won't let him know. Cos if she didn't meet me in the first instance, she won't be in this mess now. I surely believe if it's another person she met in 2006, she will be happily married now with children and will be doing fine. The action has destabilized her career and things are not that easy for her. She only takes care of the child and the man has abandoned her.

Your pastor dint tell you why and you abandon the girl. That's another level of foolishness I haven't seen. But u claim to love her,
You are now back to marry a left over after many other guys and including that your pastor have enjoyed the better part of her youth. You should be shamed of yourself and decision making.
..
See let me tell you, that Lady is not the lady u used to know..... And marrying her out of pity means u just gave her the leeway to deal with you for leaving her for years... I know u will not understand this, but trust me, u will learn the hard way.