NewStats: 3,262,099 , 8,176,068 topics. Date: Saturday, 31 May 2025 at 07:10 PM 4c1k3

Please advice me
My ex husband and I are divorced 2 years ago. He recently acquired an European citizenship, he also wants to extend the citizenship to our son. Though I thought it a good idea but I can't shake the feeling that he is trying to use that to take him away from me.
He told me our son will need to come over there to finish the process of his citizenship. But when I went to submit the "application" what I saw on it is different from what he told me. The paper read that I am consenting to my son to go and reunite with his father. Or is that the way they process it?
Please those that have gone through same should please come to my aid, this is my only child and I can't afford to lose my child this way.

this is my only child and I can't afford to lose my child this way.

Stop using "my child" when his father is still alive.

Lawyers are not as expensive as people assume. Find and speak with a lawyer. Moreso, your son needs you, not an European visa. If he wants to get his son a visa, he should begin with the guardian first, in this case, you the mother.


You are a woman and a mother. Trust your guts, you are your prophet

Zonefree:
[b][/b]
Stop using "my child" when his father is still alive.

You are completely blind to not see what the father is doing here with such a comment

1TrippleCee:
Lawyers are not as expensive as people assume. Find and speak with a lawyer. Moreso, your son needs you, not an European visa. If he wants to get his son a visa, he should begin with the guardian first, in this case, you the mother.


You are a woman and a mother. Trust your guts, you are your prophet

Thank you
I'm speaking to a lawyer as it is.

BlackfyreRebell:

Thank you
I'm speaking to a lawyer as it is.

Your son needs just God and you for a brighter future not Europe o. Boys without maternal care in Europe in this early formative years will only amount to a gangster. Its better he is Godly and you grow at the pace God wants for you abeg

Talk to a good lawyer.

He wants to stylishly take him away from you

1TrippleCee:



Your son needs just God and you for a brighter future not Europe o. Boys without maternal care in Europe in this early formative years will only amount to a gangster. Its better he is Godly and you grow at the pace God wants for you abeg

Don't mind the advise of this one. Your son needs the influence of strong father figure and if he can't get it from his biological father, i don't know where else he would get it. Besides, this is an opportunity for your son to get the hell out of this zoo called Nigeria. I'm quite certain he'd be grateful to you and his father in the future if he's successful. If you refuse, he might resent you in the future especially if he's not well to do in the future.

Itooweak4una:



Don't mind the advise of this one. Your son needs the influence of strong father figure and if he can't get it from his biological father, i don't know where else he would get it. Besides, this is an opportunity for your son to get the hell out of this zoo called Nigeria. I'm quite certain he'd be grateful to you and his father in the future if he's successful. If you refuse, he might resent you in the future especially if he's not well to do in the future.

I have trained atleast six. The last has graduated from university.

Itooweak4una:



Don't mind the advise of this one. Your son needs the influence of strong father figure and if he can't get it from his biological father, i don't know where else he would get it. Besides, this is an opportunity for your son to get the hell out of this zoo called Nigeria. I'm quite certain he'd be grateful to you and his father in the future if he's successful. If you refuse, he might resent you in the future especially if he's not well to do in the future.

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

BlackfyreRebell:

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

Since he is 10, let him remain in Nigeria and complete his secondary school education, which I believe he can by age 15-17,then his father can file for him before he clocks 18.

Go with him.

BlackfyreRebell:

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

You sound like a closeted demon.

A father is trying to guarantee a BETTER future for his kid and the only thing that crosses your mind is that he'd manipulate the kid against you?

Is that what you've been doing since the divorce?

You disgust me.

ALSO, the kid is still a MINOR. If you don't sign a consent form that states the kid is going to the European country to reunite with his father, what other explanation would you give for a 10-year old traveling across the ocean?

Realize this:

If you stop that kid from getting the citizenship of a country that works because of your own fear and insecurity, the kid will HATE you with an hatred that burns like a thousand suns when he becomes an adult.

Don't release your child. You should only allow the boy to go when he's 18- 20yrs. If you release your child to him, he will definitely manipulate the boy and cut links with you. Keep your child. What stops him from taking you along? Be wise.

Namaster:


You sound like a closeted demon.

A father is trying to guarantee a BETTER future for his kid and the only thing that crosses your mind his that he'd manipulate the kid against you?

Is that what you've been doing since the divorce?

You disgust me.

ALSO, the kid is still a MINOR. If you don't sign a consent form that states the kid is going to the European country to reunite with his father, what other explanation would you give for a 10-year old traveling across the ocean?

Realize this:

If you stop that kid from getting the citizenship of a country that works because of your own fear and insecurity, the kid will HATE you with an hatred that burns like a thousand suns when he becomes an adult.

Thanks for stopping by, though you do not have to insult me to your point accross.

Mindlog:


Since he is 10, let him remain in Nigeria and complete his secondary school education, which I believe he can by age 15-17,then his father can file for him before he clocks 18.

If he had discussed that with me i would have seen reason. After all who doesn't want to see their kid progress

LilMissFavvy:
Don't release your child. You should only allow the boy to go when he's 18- 20yrs. If you release your child to him, he will definitely manipulate the boy and cut links with you. Keep your child. What stops him from taking you along? Be wise.

Thanks

Europe, UK. USA, Canada and Australia are tightening their borders to immigration especially from Africa.


They have so many other Nations also with people who want to move to those Countries from Philippines, India, China, Nepal, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Brazil, Kenya, South Africa


I know there are a lot of risks but immigration rules change regularly. Nigeria is not high on the priority list
Of those countries to take our citizens as their immigrants (due to collective Naija bad behaviour unfortunately ) when they have so many other options and so many countries with willing and better behaved candidates to choose from


You might have your sentiments and there are risks but every Nigerian child should get a western port if possible



A word is enough for the wise

Namaster:


You sound like a closeted demon.

A father is trying to guarantee a BETTER future for his kid and the only thing that crosses your mind his that he'd manipulate the kid against you?

Is that what you've been doing since the divorce?

You disgust me.

ALSO, the kid is still a MINOR. If you don't sign a consent form that states the kid is going to the European country to reunite with his father, what other explanation would you give for a 10-year old traveling across the ocean?

Realize this:

If you stop that kid from getting the citizenship of a country that works because of your own fear and insecurity, the kid will HATE you with an hatred that burns like a thousand suns when he becomes an adult.

Know this tonight that insulting people to prove a point doesn't automatically make you intelligent, it makes you seem like a hooligan.

Biglittlelois:



Know this tonight that insulting people to prove a point doesn't automatically make you intelligent, it makes you seem like a hooligan.

Shut up, bitch!

Don't be selfish madam. Your son is also his son too let the boy have a good life.

BlackfyreRebell:
Please advice me
My ex husband and I are divorced 2 years ago. He recently acquired an European citizenship, he also wants to extend the citizenship to our son. Though I thought it a good idea but I can't shake the feeling that he is trying to use that to take him away from me.
He told me our son will need to come over there to finish the process of his citizenship. But when I went to submit the "application" what I saw on it is different from what he told me. The paper read that I am consenting to my son to go and reunite with his father. Or is that the way they process it?
Please those that have gone through same should please come to my aid, this is my only child and I can't afford to lose my child this way.

No, it`s not the way they process it as far as I`m informed. If I were you, I`d be careful too.

I think you should tell us what lead to the separation. Your insecurity might cost your child. Before anything try and reconcile with your partner. A child that grew up knowing that the parents are separated, I don't know the kind of mental and emotional training you are giving him no matter what u r able to provide for him.

BlackfyreRebell:

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

He's obviously legally taking that boy away from you...you are lucky you caught on. Your son can still relocate to the UK in the future. Let him grow up a little more with you...his new wife(if he doesn't have now, he will) may maltreat him or even poison his mind against you

Mindlog:


Since he is 10, let him remain in Nigeria and complete his secondary school education, which I believe he can by age 15-17,then his father can file for him before he clocks 18.

This idea sounds good. Let him his dad after secondary school.

BlackfyreRebell:

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

Madam, keep that child with you until he is 16 at least.

You think he's trying to take your kid away from you? Ha! That's rich coming from someone who let him go in the first place. Maybe it's time to fight for what's yours before it's too late.


Must be nice to have something worth fighting for. Good luck getting your son back once he's over there – I hear Yurop girls love Nigerian boys!

Lifeinlight:
He wants to stylishly take him away from you

Is she the sole owner??

You guys should stop this nonsense

Ishilove:

Madam, keep that child with you until he is 16 at least.

She's not the sole owner of the child and can't be the sole decision maker for him

This general female's possessiveness with regard to children needs to stop.

BlackfyreRebell:
Please advice me
My ex husband and I are divorced 2 years ago. He recently acquired an European citizenship, he also wants to extend the citizenship to our son. Though I thought it a good idea but I can't shake the feeling that he is trying to use that to take him away from me.
He told me our son will need to come over there to finish the process of his citizenship. But when I went to submit the "application" what I saw on it is different from what he told me. The paper read that I am consenting to my son to go and reunite with his father. Or is that the way they process it?
Please those that have gone through same should please come to my aid, this is my only child and I can't afford to lose my child this way.

A woman can't take the place of a fatherly figure in a man's life

Do you have a man showing your son how to be a man?

If you don't you go spoil the pikin and lass lass he will resent you years later.

The hell hole will only get uglier let your son go.

However, speak with the father tell him your fears and concerns.

If he can't convince you then you're at will to do what you want to do.

I'll warn you again a woman cannot train a man to be a man na so God make am.

You can try but nature will always have it way.

Wish you the best.

BlackfyreRebell:

What of a motherly influence? he just under 10.
The fact that he is being deceitful is what I dont understand. What if he takes him there and cut all communication with me? what if he fills his head with things he resent about me and I lose my son's love and affection?

Let switch roles here in this scenario, you are the one over there and he is the one with him here.

If he refuse this request what will you say

Note: you are divorced,so just erase any entitlement mentality.
He can only pick his son.