NewStats: 3,265,268 , 8,186,174 topics. Date: Saturday, 14 June 2025 at 07:25 AM 4n4a1x

I need help concerning my relationship which I'm not sure still stands. My guy and I have been dating for a year and half now and he his a very caring and great guy. He his Muslim and I'm a Christian and we both agreed to do our religion without hindering one another. We hardly fight and we settle our quarrels almost immediately.
Recently, my guy and I had a quarrel about communication which I kinda complain to him and I notice he just acted non challant towards and wasn't even trying to correct or amend. This lasted for like 3 wks and we barely talked during those period ( longest we've ever had to quarrel). He would not call me and if I called he would give excuses of different kinds especially " I slept off". Anyways we settled and I went to his place for the weekends but then I decided to go to work from his house the following week. I wasn't feeling sleepy that Sunday night and i decided to play some games on my fone but it was low so I used my guys charger and unplugged his fone. I decide d to play with his instead. Mind u I don't go tru his fone cos I trust him and I don't really think it is necessary but he goes tru mine every single time I come visiting. That's why he didn't change his I guess, cos he felt save.
I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

lamikas:
■ I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

I am afraid you had been dating yourself for a while there. You did nothing wrong and no, you did not overreact. Better to cut off now than after you have invested even more of your time and you.

tears activated... For your own good, leave that guy, I know you are going through emotional pains, but it's necessary for your healing... That guy is using you to time.. and the other girl is the real deals.. it's better you move on...... If you go back to him... It must surely end in tears.... Good luck in your next relationship...

What else do you want us to tell you

You are seeing those tiny naked redflag without the use of microscope , yet you have the time to seek for advice?.

😂😂😂😂


This one got me like crying and laughing.

What if I'm just using her to time

THIS ALONE SHOULD GIVE YOU SOME SENSES.

You had better start thanking God for this early Christmas gift He has given you. You that should be doing thanksgiving in church, you're here crying.

Is it the wedding plans of next year you're looking at? The bitter truth is that your marriage would most likely not have happened. A man that refuses to take pictures with or even send pictures to his girlfriend of almost two years but is happily exchanging with his so called friend?

Emotionally his heart is with her, and that's why he has neither texted nor called. Or he would have married you then eventually marry her into that same house and the next thing you'd hear is, after all I'm a muslim and it is permitted in my religion.

Your first sign of his cheating was when he was constantly checking your phone. People who cheat are always dreadfully suspicious about their partners because they believe everyone is doing the same thing that they are doing.

So sis, this one's not for you and God got you out early. Though it may hurt now, but when I tell you that five years down the line when you're laughing with your husband and kids and you randomly how you felt about this guy, you would just be laughing at yourself.

Or you can as well go and beg him and let the misery begin. It's your call 🤷🏽‍♀️

Clicked:
■ Or you can as well go and beg him and let the misery begin. It's your call 🤷🏽‍♀️

@lamikas, your profile shows you have been on Nairaland long enough to understand why you feel the way you do now. You already know this is not a man for you but [url=Love, Actually: The science behind lust, attraction, and companionship]the chemicals in your brain[/url] won't let it all die that easy. Somehow your brain needs you to mourn all of the time and effort you invested in trying to make the relationship work, and none of that has anything to do with the boy himself being good or anything of that sort. (Chemicals can't tell such things.) So, grieve and decide today never to settle for the same or similar red flags in your next relationship abeg.

Malo guys usually use Christian women as sperm deposit box. Better leave him..

Try and reconcile with him because relationship no be moimoi talk more of marriage. You need to be patient, there are things you need to endure and overlook, communication is key in resolving issues and stop taking drastic decisions without thinking it through.

ikeno:
■ Try and reconcile with him because relationship no be moimoi talk more of marriage. You need to be patient, there are things you need to endure and overlook, communication is key in resolving issues and stop taking drastic decisions without thinking it through.

Interesting!

So, what you are telling us is that you would overlook your girlfriend cheating on you with another boy whom she claims is merely for ing time with?

lamikas:

Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

i like when this happens. you just keep thinking and wondering while guy man keeps living his sweet life. That is a very nice Limbo to get stuck in. Next you start stalking him on WhatsApp & all.

How can you date someone of a different religion? Matchewww

You said you are done with him, slet it be so. Why areyvyou regreingt your decision?

Better you move on with your life. That guy will never chose you over the ijab lady

My advise to you is Move on & Don't look back. He doesn't respect you at all.

lamikas:
I need help concerning my relationship which I'm not sure still stands. My guy and I have been dating for a year and half now and he his a very caring and great guy. He his Muslim and I'm a Christian and we both agreed to do our religion without hindering one another. We hardly fight and we settle our quarrels almost immediately.
Recently, my guy and I had a quarrel about communication which I kinda complain to him and I notice he just acted non challant towards and wasn't even trying to correct or amend. This lasted for like 3 wks and we barely talked during those period ( longest we've ever had to quarrel). He would not call me and if I called he would give excuses of different kinds especially " I slept off". Anyways we settled and I went to his place for the weekends but then I decided to go to work from his house the following week. I wasn't feeling sleepy that Sunday night and i decided to play some games on my fone but it was low so I used my guys charger and unplugged his fone. I decide d to play with his instead. Mind u I don't go tru his fone cos I trust him and I don't really think it is necessary but he goes tru mine every single time I come visiting. That's why he didn't change his I guess, cos he felt save.
I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

Let me tell you the truth...he was looking for opportunity to break up with you. He couldn't come up with a good reason...and u did the blocking yourself..perfect plan for him..now he will ease into this new found freedom and focus on the hijabi..its hurtful but u mustnt cry over spilt milk..move on and stop wasting your time with him. If u agree to accept him the knacking go continue but it will end nowhere.

Now you want to start blaming yourself for him hurting you.

He isn't into u. Maybe, before he was, but now he isn't anymore.

Kobojunkie:
Interesting!

So, what you are telling us is that you would overlook your girlfriend cheating on you with another boy whom she claims is merely for ing time with?

Men and women are not the same nau.


You don't know what's good for Ugandans is not good for the Greeks?

If you find him cheating and he isn't remorseful, you should know what you want.
Use your tongue to count your teeth madam. You deserve to be respected, but you have to respect yourself if you want to be respected.

ikeno:
Try and reconcile with him because relationship no be moimoi talk more of marriage. You need to be patient, there are things you need to endure and overlook, communication is key in resolving issues and stop taking drastic decisions without thinking it through.

A Christian advising a Christian, to endure her cheating Muslim BF who sees all Christians as infidels. it seems Misogyny no know religion abi...
GTFOUH!!!

Babe, run for your life and NEVER look back. That guy is egoistic and you will regret if you make the mistake of getting married to him.

I am also concerned about the differences in religion. It may or may not work out, but for your peace of mind, it is better to get entangled with someone who shares similar religious views with you; unless your plan is to convert to Islam.

I know a Christian lady who married a Muslim guy and during one of those religious crisis, she didn't feel safe in her own home and had to seek refuge amongst the Christians. A lot of things happened and I can only tell you to look before you leap.

ikeno:
Try and reconcile with him because relationship no be moimoi talk more of marriage. You need to be patient, there are things you need to endure and overlook, communication is key in resolving issues and stop taking drastic decisions without thinking it through.

Person wey never enter marriage make she dey patient so when he enter marriage she can be lonely and get married to herself Abi 🤔

It's alright

Thank God u have realized this before it's too late..

U said u are a christain and he is a Muslim and yet he is dating an hijab lady and sending her pictures and he hardly send or snap pictures with you 🤔

Are u thinking what am thinking now 🤔

U didn't over react rather u did a great job ..

Don't block him anywhere but just don't call him and likely u may even delete his ..

And face forward and let go 🙏

You can meet a better christains brother and offer someday plz don't force urself on him 🙏

lamikas:
I need help concerning my relationship which I'm not sure still stands. My guy and I have been dating for a year and half now and he his a very caring and great guy. He his Muslim and I'm a Christian and we both agreed to do our religion without hindering one another. We hardly fight and we settle our quarrels almost immediately.
Recently, my guy and I had a quarrel about communication which I kinda complain to him and I notice he just acted non challant towards and wasn't even trying to correct or amend. This lasted for like 3 wks and we barely talked during those period ( longest we've ever had to quarrel). He would not call me and if I called he would give excuses of different kinds especially " I slept off". Anyways we settled and I went to his place for the weekends but then I decided to go to work from his house the following week. I wasn't feeling sleepy that Sunday night and i decided to play some games on my fone but it was low so I used my guys charger and unplugged his fone. I decide d to play with his instead. Mind u I don't go tru his fone cos I trust him and I don't really think it is necessary but he goes tru mine every single time I come visiting. That's why he didn't change his I guess, cos he felt save.
I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

Better move on, religious differences is already a huge red flag on its own.

This is when you should love him the more. Forgive and forget. You know AGE IS NO LONGER ON YOUR SIDE.

lamikas:
I need help concerning my relationship which I'm not sure still stands. My guy and I have been dating for a year and half now and he his a very caring and great guy. He his Muslim and I'm a Christian and we both agreed to do our religion without hindering one another. We hardly fight and we settle our quarrels almost immediately.
Recently, my guy and I had a quarrel about communication which I kinda complain to him and I notice he just acted non challant towards and wasn't even trying to correct or amend. This lasted for like 3 wks and we barely talked during those period ( longest we've ever had to quarrel). He would not call me and if I called he would give excuses of different kinds especially " I slept off". Anyways we settled and I went to his place for the weekends but then I decided to go to work from his house the following week. I wasn't feeling sleepy that Sunday night and i decided to play some games on my fone but it was low so I used my guys charger and unplugged his fone. I decide d to play with his instead. Mind u I don't go tru his fone cos I trust him and I don't really think it is necessary but he goes tru mine every single time I come visiting. That's why he didn't change his I guess, cos he felt save.
I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.

You are lucky. Thank your God

lamikas:
I need help concerning my relationship which I'm not sure still stands. My guy and I have been dating for a year and half now and he his a very caring and great guy. He his Muslim and I'm a Christian and we both agreed to do our religion without hindering one another. We hardly fight and we settle our quarrels almost immediately.
Recently, my guy and I had a quarrel about communication which I kinda complain to him and I notice he just acted non challant towards and wasn't even trying to correct or amend. This lasted for like 3 wks and we barely talked during those period ( longest we've ever had to quarrel). He would not call me and if I called he would give excuses of different kinds especially " I slept off". Anyways we settled and I went to his place for the weekends but then I decided to go to work from his house the following week. I wasn't feeling sleepy that Sunday night and i decided to play some games on my fone but it was low so I used my guys charger and unplugged his fone. I decide d to play with his instead. Mind u I don't go tru his fone cos I trust him and I don't really think it is necessary but he goes tru mine every single time I come visiting. That's why he didn't change his I guess, cos he felt save.
I decided to check his Whatsapp and the first message I clicked on was a that wasn't saved on his fone. I read the message and found out my guy was cheating on me with a girl he claimed was like a younger sister to him. This guy barely takes pics and funny enough I don't have any recent pics of him. If I take a picture of us or him alone, he would delete it from my fone without my knowledge. And yet he sent the girl his recent pic. I was heartbroken when I read their chat but didn't do anything till the next day. I called him after I got back from work and confronted him, he didn't deny, he only said and I quote " what gave u the right read my chat? And besides I know what I'm doing, I'm not stupid. What if I'm just using her to time, u are just overreacting towards this tin". While we were still arguing, I told him I was done with him, that we are over. he seem shocked then after a while cut the call and in annoyance, I blocked him in every place I could. Then I unblocked him after two days but he didn't call back or text.
Now my I'm wondering if I overreacted in that situation. We were already planning to get married next year. maybe I shouldn't have blocked him. Maybe he his into her becos she's a hijabi.


You agreed on maintaining your religion after getting married right? What about that of your children?

Your case is similar to As wanting to marry As

Marriage is beyond feelings, it is a reality. A reality that must be calculated and balanced.

I can tell you for free he is ing time with you and keeping the hijab sister.

He sees her as sexually pure and can be keep for marriage but you for conquering Kongo

How on earth can you be sleeping/living with a man you are not married to?

You are desperate and he is feeding on it.

Thank God it's happening earlier so you can heal fast and more move on.

Pele

[quote author=Nitoriolohun1 post=127540242][/quote] I wasn't living with him... I just spend the weekend most times