NewStats: 3,259,347 , 8,169,865 topics. Date: Saturday, 24 May 2025 at 06:30 PM 4p2q4f

This thread does not intend to portray the church in a bad light, however, to point out obvious characters that made up its congregation.

1) The overzealous

These appear dedicated to their faith that sometimes you begin to wonder if they're flesh and blood.

If you are looking for a true definition of I'm holier than thou, look no further, they represent everything in-between.

This group of Christians sees anyone who does not operate on the same frequency as them as inferior or better still sinners disguised as Christians.

The worst thing about most of them is, a little encounter with them portrays them to be the exact opposite of what you think they are, transact business with them you'll appreciate better how greed and covetousness are their lots

These believed they own the church, and they most times control the church leadership.


2) The ordinary

These are my favorite type, their own is to attend church services and go home straight, and they don't have time for church politics whatsoever.

The more you try to involve and lure them closer the farther they stay away, they go to church because they're convinced to do so not because of persuasion from anyone.

You'll feel comfortable associating with them more than any other type of member, to them humanity is first before religion.

3) The phone pressers

If you've not noticed these types of in recent times, you probably are not a regular in the church.

The moment they get sited, they make their phones a companion that no message or order of service matters.

Peep through, you'll be amazed they're on social media, chatting on WhatsApp, etc.

They'll use the entrance and exit more than the ushers, why are they walking up and down? They're talking calls.

4) The fashion

These group of hardly come to church, they visit on rare occasions especially when they have new or modern cloth to show off.

They'll be the last to walk into the church when every member is sited and can take cognizance of their attire.

They are filled with innate pride and can give you that gory look if you overstep your boundary into their space by error.

Nothing matters to them more than their clothes and respect.

5) The sleeping

Everybody may have been a victim of sudden sleep in the church, however, some are sole custodians of sleeping in the church as always that you'll think they have sleeping sicknesses.

They'll bathe in their house, and put on their best attire just to fall asleep the moment their butts hit the church sit.

Ushers don't tap them anymore, as they easily pick offense for no reason, it's well.


6) The chaikers/receivers

I purposely saved this group of for the last spot.

Either you refute it or accept it, they are in your church.

The only reason they come to church is to toss babes and most babes are there to give and receive signals too.

Messages about holiness and against fornication are not for them, they are always busy looking for their like and they'll surely get it.

Haven't you heard instances where people were caught having sex in the church toilet or nearby hideouts during night vigils, most parents don't even know what their children are up to. Now you know.

There you have a few on the list, feel free to add yours.

Number 2. That's me. No time for church politics and gossips. Worship and go home.

I'm just here to have fun, let's get turnt up

lalasticlala:
Number 2. That's me. No time for church politics and gossips. Worship and go home.

You went on annual leave?
Welcome back, all those flooding threads are suppose to have snake news as byproducts because snakes go with flooding.

I went to church because of pressure from my parents and friends and siblings. Since I moved from home, I've not been to church. And I don't care.
Happy to hear from you, Lalasticlala. Hope you're good

Am number 2 by a mile. I go to church to hear the word and leave immediately the service is over. You'll be more focused and highly respected.

Three types of I find during praise session.

1. The over dancing . These ones when it's time for praise, you will see how they will be dancing like say they are in a party.

2. The over clapping . These ones they usually have big hands, if they are clapping during praise session, your ear go almost block.

3. The twerking . These ones are usually Calabar women, so you this mostly in Calabar dominated churches. When it's time for praise, you will see them dancing Calabar traditional dance where they will bend and be shaking their yansh. Some of them will even leave their seats, come in front of you and be shaking their yansh.

All of then na the same.. Pretenders.

If u drip come church go wahala
If u no drip na headache
You get tithe na wahla
You no get na oppression

Last last ....

Lol

People that look for pastor mistake and use it to gain traffic on social media

You're busy condeming and criticizing other types of christians. Which one are you?

Do you and let others do them.

Donraqh:
This thread does not intend to portray the church in a bad light, however, to point out obvious characters that made up its congregation.

1) The overzealous

These appear dedicated to their faith that sometimes you begin to wonder if they're flesh and blood.

If you are looking for a true definition of I'm holier than thou, look no further, they represent everything in-between.

This group of Christians sees anyone who does not operate on the same frequency as them as inferior or better still sinners disguised as Christians.

The worst thing about most of them is, a little encounter with them portrays them to be the exact opposite of what you think they are, transact business with them you'll appreciate better how greed and covetousness are their lots

These believed they own the church, and they most times control the church leadership.


2) The ordinary

These are my favorite type, their own is to attend church services and go home straight, and they don't have time for church politics whatsoever.

The more you try to involve and lure them closer the farther they stay away, they go to church because they're convinced to do so not because of persuasion from anyone.

You'll feel comfortable associating with them more than any other type of member, to them humanity is first before religion.

3) The phone pressers

If you've not noticed these types of in recent times, you probably are not a regular in the church.

The moment they get sited, they make their phones a companion that no message or order of service matters.

Peep through, you'll be amazed they're on social media, chatting on WhatsApp, etc.

They'll use the entrance and exit more than the ushers, why are they walking up and down? They're talking calls.

4) The fashion

These group of hardly come to church, they visit on rare occasions especially when they have new or modern cloth to show off.

They'll be the last to walk into the church when every member is sited and can take cognizance of their attire.

They are filled with innate pride and can give you that gory look if you overstep your boundary into their space by error.

Nothing matters to them more than their clothes and respect.

5) The sleeping

Everybody may have been a victim of sudden sleep in the church, however, some are sole custodians of sleeping in the church as always that you'll think they have sleeping sicknesses.

They'll bathe in their house, and put on their best attire just to fall asleep the moment their butts hit the church sit.

Ushers don't tap them anymore, as they easily pick offense for no reason, it's well.


6) The chaikers/receivers

I purposely saved this group of for the last spot.

Either you refute it or accept it, they are in your church.

The only reason they come to church is to toss babes and most babes are there to give and receive signals too.

Messages about holiness and against fornication are not for them, they are always busy looking for their like and they'll surely get it.

Haven't you heard instances where people were caught having sex in the church toilet or nearby hideouts during night vigils, most parents don't even know what their children are up to. Now you know.

There you have a few on the list, feel free to add yours.

The ones that beefs with everyone

Y

Omo

Happy Sunday everyone

Welcome back lalasticlala

U wil find people that will carry politics for head and be doing analysis about Tinubu and obi

Ordinary report here..

Lolz! May God help us all.

A certain guy that came to church because of a girl

lalasticlala:
Number 2. That's me. No time for church politics and gossips. Worship and go home.

Yay!! Lala... .
I've missed you, bruv.

The homeless

lalasticlala:
Number 2. That's me. No time for church politics and gossips. Worship and go home.

So na you be the lalasticlacla wen I dey hear every time

Ok,


Next please

Church d biggest scam in history
Me I don't even go again na online church I dey watch now
Know dis and get rest of mind

I fall in no2 , church is suppose to be about worshipping God shadure kin shami and go ur way which one village meeting association
U forgot to add those who came for the music dancing,when he reach preaching them go begin Japa small small

Allisgud:
I fall in no2 , church is suppose to be about worshipping God shadure kin shami and go ur way which one village meeting association
U forgot to add those who came for the music dancing,when he reach preaching them go begin Japa small small

Lol. Exactly!