NewStats: 3,261,815 , 8,175,250 topics. Date: Friday, 30 May 2025 at 04:47 PM 1i652v

Good evening everyone. To cut the long story short my mental health issues started in 2012 when I tried weed in the university. It's not genetic. I've also been in and out of psychiatric hospitals a good number of times. However I'm currently on medication and I've been able to manage the condition. I was also able to graduate and I've also done my nysc and my family is planning on opening a small business for me since job has not been forthcoming.

However my health condition has been kept secret by me and family and I'm currently dating a nice girl. Please should I tell her my secret. What caused most of my episodes was refusal to take my medication and all that but right now I'm very okay and for some few years now I've been going about my daily affairs without any issue. If I let the cat out of the bag I don't think she may stay cos the stigma of mental health issues is not a joke. Please I need your advice on how to handle this delicate issue. Thanks

Tell her the truth cos nothing hide the sun for ever. If she heard it from another source it will be a disaster

Tell her the truth cos nothing hide under the sun for ever. If she heard it from another source it will be a disaster

Dude397:
Good evening everyone. To cut the long story short my mental health issues started in 2012 when I tried weed in the university. It's not genetic. I've also been in and out of psychiatric hospitals a good number of times. However I'm currently on medication and I've been able to manage the condition. I was also able to graduate and I've also done my nysc and my family is planning on opening a small business for me since job has not been forthcoming.

However my health condition has been kept secret by me and family and I'm currently dating a nice girl. Please should I tell her my secret. What caused most of my episodes was refusal to take my medication and all that but right now I'm very okay and for some few years now I've been going about my daily affairs without any issue. If I let the cat out of the bag I don't think she may stay cos the stigma of mental health issues is not a joke. Please I need your advice on how to handle this delicate issue. Thanks

No be small thing ooo.
If you tell her, your love story go get k leg Sha.
I once had an ex that had mental issues. Lol

I think it shouldn't be now because if you tell her now, she'll later come to nairaland or somewhere else for advice. Let her sensitivity triggers you to tell her the truth.

Truthfully, between you & the girl, I don't know who to pity more. If you know you're not totally okay, please stay away from r/ship for now to avoid stories that touch. But if you know you're now sound, I would advise you tell her. If she loves you, she would stay. And if she doesn't, that means she isn't for you.

Be kind to her and find a perfect timing to tell her about it before she hears it outside , there's no need to hide it if she will stay, she will and if not you will find someone else..

That's why it's good to make some personal findings about anyone you are having a relationship with. The innocent lady will be thinking she's with a sane person

Say no to hard drugs and try to maintain your medications.

You can't keep it hidden forever. You should open up to her if you see a future with her

If you are the chosen one
She won't leave you
Even if you are Satan's Big Brother

If she accepted you
It is a 50:50 chance

What will one not read on Nairaland?
You are having mental issues and you are in a relationship, what are you doing there

Anyways I wish you speedy and total recovery

aprilwise:
Tell her the truth cos nothing hide under the sun for ever. If she heard it from another source it will be a disaster

Noted. Thanks

EkehPraise:


What will one not read on Nairaland?
You are having mental issues and you are in a relationship, what are you doing there

Shut up if you can’t read

This nairaland has it own way of pushing someone into depression

The rate of useless people in this site is alarming
One worst site to seek for solutions when depressed

Prechgold1180:

Shut up if you can’t read

I will not shut up.
Post your own comment and leave me alone.

Mood11:

Be kind to her and find a good timing to tell her about it before she hears it outside , there's no need to hide it if she will stay, she will and if not you will find someone else..
That's why it's good to make some personal findings about anyone you are having a relationship with. The innocent lady will be thinking she's with a sane person not knowing say you belong to psychiatric hospital.


Say no to hard drugs and try to maintain your medications. Madness is a serious issue. The good girl deserves to know that some nuts dey lose from time to time make you no break plank on her head one day

Good talk.

I mean no harm but, How would I know if this your write up wasn't as result of the atom of madness displaying?

Jeremani:
I mean no harm but, How would I know if this your write up wasn't as result of the atom of madness displaying?

Dude397:
Good evening everyone. To cut the long story short my mental health issues started in 2012 when I tried weed in the university. It's not genetic. I've also been in and out of psychiatric hospitals a good number of times. However I'm currently on medication and I've been able to manage the condition. I was also able to graduate and I've also done my nysc and my family is planning on opening a small business for me since job has not been forthcoming.

However my health condition has been kept secret by me and family and I'm currently dating a nice girl. Please should I tell her my secret. What caused most of my episodes was refusal to take my medication and all that but right now I'm very okay and for some few years now I've been going about my daily affairs without any issue. If I let the cat out of the bag I don't think she may stay cos the stigma of mental health issues is not a joke. Please I need your advice on how to handle this delicate issue. Thanks

You have to tell her! She will most likely leave you but tell her. You don't even need a relationship for now, no be she force you go take drug, why you wan use your own kobalize another person?

Mood11:
Be kind to her and find a perfect timing to tell her about it before she hears it outside , there's no need to hide it if she will stay, she will and if not you will find someone else..

That's why it's good to make some personal findings about anyone you are having a relationship with. The innocent lady will be thinking she's with a sane person

Say no to hard drugs and try to maintain your medications. Madness is a serious issue. The good girl deserves to know that some nuts dey lose from time to time make you no break plank on her head one day

Broooooooooooo, calm down please!

No be only you o, we plenty with mental

Wetin be that Faze song sef...

EkehPraise:


What will one not read on Nairaland?
You are having mental issues and you are in a relationship, what are you doing there

Anyways I wish you speedy and total recovery

Mental health issues shouldn't make anyone pause thier lives. A lot of people out there have issues like acute depression, bipolar, eating disorder, PTSD, anxiety disorder, ADHD, OCD, etc. and they're married with kids. Some of these mental health issues are curable while others are manageable. OP just needs to let his loved ones (including the lady) know cause it would be very unfair if he doesn't.

WoundedLamb:


Mental health issues shouldn't make anyone pause thier lives. A lot of people out there have issues like acute depression, bipolar, eating disorder, PTSD, anxiety disorder, ADHD, OCD, etc. and they're married with kids. Some of these mental health issues are curable while others are manageable. OP just needs to let his loved ones (including the lady) know cause it would be very unfair if he doesn't.

Don't mind them. They don't know that many Nigerians have mental issues but it's not yet diagnosed.

Dude397:
Good evening everyone. To cut the long story short my mental health issues started in 2012 when I tried weed in the university. It's not genetic. I've also been in and out of psychiatric hospitals a good number of times. However I'm currently on medication and I've been able to manage the condition. I was also able to graduate and I've also done my nysc and my family is planning on opening a small business for me since job has not been forthcoming.

However my health condition has been kept secret by me and family and I'm currently dating a nice girl. Please should I tell her my secret. What caused most of my episodes was refusal to take my medication and all that but right now I'm very okay and for some few years now I've been going about my daily affairs without any issue. If I let the cat out of the bag I don't think she may stay cos the stigma of mental health issues is not a joke. Please I need your advice on how to handle this delicate issue. Thanks

Tell her how it started

Realday:
I think it shouldn't be now because if you tell her now, she'll later come to nairaland or somewhere else for advice. Let her sensitivity triggers you to tell her the truth.

The best time is not later, it's not even now. Truth is that the best time has ed.

Things like this are better discussed in the very beginning when emotions have not been invested in the relationship. That's usually when she can make clear and sound decisions. There's a level a relationship will get to and leaving because of certain red flags becomes difficult because decisions are being made emotionally instead of logically.

OP should open up to her already, let her know what she's getting into. If she stays, the gods are good otherwise he should get over it and move on.

At the appointed time, he will meet the one that will stay.

Tell her you took weed but stopped and you're going through medication .

I don't care whether you tell her or not. what i care about is you taking your medication because i want you to be okay. Thanks

Better you tell her. If she loves you, she'll stay otherwise let her go.

Hiding this kind of serious issue from her will not be fair and if she gets to find out herself, she will never forgive you.

Just brace yourself for the worst and tell her.

By the way, does it mean You're bound to the medication for life?

Can you go without the medications, and if you do, wouldnt there be a relapse?

Are you sure you are well enough to go through the pressures of marriage?

It is well.

SimplyFacts:
Truthfully, between you & the girl, I don't know who to pity more. If you know you're not totally okay, please stay away from r/ship for now to avoid stories that touch. But if you know you're now sound, I would advise you tell her. If she loves you, she would stay. And if she doesn't, that means she isn't for you.

I'm surprise you guys are asking him to tell her,there are things that should stay with you forever.Op if you tell her now and she break up with you your mental problem may be trigger again. Please keep the secret for now

Clinghton:
Tell her you took weed but stopped and you're going through medication .

You know that's a lie and deceit of the highest order.

What of the damaging effect the weed caused him? I mean not every one who takes weed have mental issues. Ops case is different and making her believe he only took weeds without telling her what it did to him is tantamount to deceit and it is even better he doesn't tell her anything than lying or modifying the truth.

The Main issue is not Opening up to Her or Not!

It is HOPE YOU WILL NOT EVER GO BACK TO WEED?
She will definitely Run once she hears! Ladies are always scared of things like dis!

You must need to give yourself a Year for Total Healing and Transformation!!
Use 2022 for Dat!

Den 2023, Start Relationships and have as many Girlfriends as you like!

This is a very vital information.

It is wickedness on your part if you do not tell her.