NewStats: 3,263,633 , 8,180,862 topics. Date: Saturday, 07 June 2025 at 12:17 AM 4g6n38

peciouslove:

I havent taken any decision yet dear. but i guess its still too fresh and soon to come to an hasty decision...only time will tell

Note: I want to ask you. Dont you think its safer to marry someone you dont really love so much? In that case this kinda decision will be so quick and in a flash! no thinking required? this is just food for thought

buklan4real@yah:
@op, seriously, i cried reading dis post...many ppl are hrtless.

my piece of advice is dat, pls, forgive her as tym goes on u will truly knw who she is
nd as tym goes on u will forget it...

Tnanks im trying to forgive them( the two parties), but more difficult forgetting.... Thank God this story is not juicy like a screaming headline ' HUSBAND BEHEAD WIFE AND BROTHER IN LAW FOR COMMITTING ADULTERY!'

Monicasque: so OP have you taken your decision yet?

I havent taken any decision yet dear. but i guess its still too fresh and soon to come to an hasty decision...only time will tell

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2s£xy:
Hmmm... I see you have a soft heart. Too bad mine has been smashed until it became hard.

Bros, one question I have aside the wailing and plea is: What if you didn't find out do you think they would have stopped?

Some people may feel I am being wicked but honestly, that's crocodile tears to me. There are a lot of questions to be asked and seeing the age gap, that reminds me of Funmi Odukoya's book on marriage. It was stated there that marrying a young woman of early age could seem like a cage and she would want to explore more.

I have a friend based in the US who had similar issue. I can't state if she cheated on him but one fact that stood was that she opted OUT of the marriage that has 3 daughters. My friend tried everything possible to save the marriage but her mind was made up. He granted her wish and today, he is the one taking care of the 3 daughter and he is even doing a better job at it than, what I believe, the mother of the 3 girls. I later observed that it had to do with age and it seemed the girl/lady in question got married when she hadn't made up her mind and much at a younger age.

When girls in this category see their fellow mates still catching fun, they often fall prey. I am yet to see any of such girls handle it with maturity. Marriage comes with maturity...

Na now she wan cry abi? When she was enjoying it she didn't realise her atrocity?

What about your inlaw and friend?

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2s£xy:
Hmmm... I see you have a soft heart. Too bad mine has been smashed until it became hard.

Bros, one question I have aside the wailing and plea is: What if you didn't find out do you think they would have stopped?

Some people may feel I am being wicked but honestly, that's crocodile tears to me. There are a lot of questions to be asked and seeing the age gap, that reminds me of Funmi Odukoya's book on marriage. It was stated there that marrying a young woman of early age could seem like a cage and she would want to explore more.

I have a friend based in the US who had similar issue. I can't state if she cheated on him but one fact that stood was that she opted OUT of the marriage that has 3 daughters. My friend tried everything possible to save the marriage but her mind was made up. He granted her wish and today, he is the one taking care of the 3 daughter and he is even doing a better job at it than, what I believe, the mother of the 3 girls. I later observed that it had to do with age and it seemed the girl/lady in question got married when she hadn't made up her mind and much at a younger age.

When girls in this category see their fellow mates still catching fun, they often fall prey. I am yet to see any of such girls handle it with maturity. Marriage comes with maturity...

Na now she wan cry abi? When she was enjoying it she didn't realise her atrocity?

What about your inlaw and friend?

[/b]

2s£xy:
Hmmm... I see you have a soft heart. Too bad mine has been smashed until it became hard.

Bros, one question I have aside the wailing and plea is: What if you didn't find out do you think they would have stopped?

Some people may feel I am being wicked but honestly, that's crocodile tears to me. There are a lot of questions to be asked and seeing the age gap, that reminds me of Funmi Odukoya's book on marriage. It was stated there that marrying a young woman of early age could seem like a cage and she would want to explore more.

I have a friend based in the US who had similar issue. I can't state if she cheated on him but one fact that stood was that she opted OUT of the marriage that has 3 daughters. My friend tried everything possible to save the marriage but her mind was made up. He granted her wish and today, he is the one taking care of the 3 daughter and he is even doing a better job at it than, what I believe, the mother of the 3 girls. I later observed that it had to do with age and it seemed the girl/lady in question got married when she hadn't made up her mind and much at a younger age.

When girls in this category see their fellow mates still catching fun, they often fall prey. I am yet to see any of such girls handle it with maturity. Marriage comes with maturity...

Na now she wan cry abi? When she was enjoying it she didn't realise her atrocity?

What about your inlaw and friend?

What u said in paragrapgh too also caught my attention, what if i dint discover this on time? will they have owned up and beg like they are doing now? i doubt it.hmmmm

I came across this and i find it interesting. This just happened to me.... still not sure what to do yet. But the story is also in public domain here in nairaland.

Both sides..its easier said than done...when reality dawns on one (like me here) its like im in a trance or watching movie...

Please what does forgiveness actually means? Can someone forgive and forget at the same time especially when it borders on trust and betrayal? after you forgive, what about the pain and trauma that goes with it? can one ever get over issues like this?

I told them i have already forgiven them, However there will be implication and consequence.I will still be seperated from the two of them at least for now, and the condition for even re-considering my wife is so strict and stern that a normal lady will opt to just walk away.She was however willing to abide by all condition and this surprised me...she is willing to do anything everything to save her marriage, something she never considered when she was inflicting such hard pain on me.

All single ladies and guys, all married men and women, please take into consideration wide implications and repercussion of your action if you decide to cheat on your partner.

Interesting my wife have seen this post on nairaland and she said she follows it everyday! She painfully reads all the unbiased comments from this public domain and she can judge herself too( maybe that also influence her resolve to do anything to save her marraige). I wont also be surprised if she also comment on this thread very soon.....

NnekaGirl: I am sure there are alot of serious girls who would like to take her place,she literaly killed you by doing what she did.If you forgive her today what if she does the same thing later??
I applaud your maturity,you behaved responsibly kudos!!I pray that God gives you strength to get through this,but there are still a responsible woman out there,who would value you and value the sanctity of marriage.

My major fear is forgiving and same person repeating same thing in the near future, even though she has been begging really hard and threatnening to end her life if the marraige ends, she has been crying and wailing and willing to do ANYTHING to save her marriage and relationship with me,naturally as a human being i felt for her emotionally with all her plea and what she is going through presently( she lives with her parent now) however the heart of man.... what if she does it again.....

Valeree: OP what is the age gap between you and ur wife? Did u marry a kid, a girl or a woman? Sometimes these things matter, but men never see it dat way. A 32 year old can marry a 16 year old girl thinking dat nothing is wrong so far she can deliver a baby, but psychologically she is not yet matured and hasnt developed the firm conscience of saying No to other mens advances. Dis kind of stories are rampant among men with much age gaps btw dia wives. Reminds me of my neighbour dat married his wife wen she was 18 and him 39, made her a full time housewife and opened pepper soup t for her. infact the whole of the male customers slept wit the wife at a point the man started doubting the paternity of his second child..
Meanwhile men have to be carefull in choosing their wives, every female can marry and deliver a baby but not all can be a wife and mother.

Yeah she is far younger than i am, But we sat down and discuss this while dating, all the implication of getting 'caged' in marraige was laid before her, she agreed this is what she wanted and she wont go back on it.She promised she wont miss anything if she gets married and we went all the way with her promise and assurance.

2s£xy:
Bros, EVEN me dey fear now as I read the OP message oh.

I have been in brown study since, this sh*t is scary...

I appreciate all for all your advice be rest assured all comments and advice makes me feel lighter.... im back at work this morning. My wife came to my hospital bed to "care for me as a wife" as she put it,she vowed if she ever do such again she shd bring curse on her self.. i was just starring at her... My advice to all who trust fellow human being 100% should thread softly.... the 2 confessed in the height of their ion they were saying everything they knew ( me and and my sis ) to eachother! imagine if i had a dirty secret with my inlaw and best friend....imagine if i had backbite my inlaw in the presence of my wife.....it will have been in the public domain.For me even though i dont yet how i will get over this, but pls learn just few lessons from my misadventure into the path of friendship, relationship and marriage. Ofcourse its the grace of God that i kept calm and dint even raise my hand against my wife....and this may not likely make me hate other ladies or take it out on them.

I still wish I'm gonna wake and find out this is all a dream. I'm currenty depressed with presures from all sides, I'm currently in hospital bed for few days bed rest...

simpleseyi: Your wife, mother-in-law and friend want you to keep it secret because of their plan-B. The plan-B is to send hired assassins to delete you. Thereafter, they will decide what to do with your sister. Continue living with death at your own risk.

My advice: Tell your mother, brothers, sisters and father-in-law today and right this minute before these people delete you. The next 5 minutes may be too late. Don't let these devils use God to blackmail you.

Everybody knows about it now.... my sis is aware and my father in law, he waz short of word. My sis felt devastated and currently threatning to leave her husband...with 3 kids! My wife have been coming to the house begging and pleading(she said she dint understand what happened to her)but she has always been sent back by my cousin, for me I lack the emotional strenght to even do anything to her when she came...i was just starring at her blankly while she was crying and pleading. And another sad thing is i have a 7 months old baby wth her......

Richfella:

My brother, on the surface, it appears that something terrible has happened to you.

But in reality, this could be one of the best things to ever happen to you. Kindly PM me.

Please send me your private email

oduz: Sincere Sympathies

Haven suffered betrayal, don't punish yourself with the BURDEN of worry

Leave the culprits to nurture that for the rest of their lives

Withdraw from business deals with Him

If she has kids for you keep her. Dont spread the news beyond your her parents & yours (the world is filled with immature hypocrates)

Don't report it to your sister, she may not be able to handle it, & she may not get a more saintly replacement

Only the STRONG have the courage to Forgive

Stay Happy, Cheers

Im in serious dilemna, many of family already knew between monday and today, Im undergoing pressure from her mum not to tell her Dad.She doesnt want her to come back and stay in their house...my family will have non of that.My sis isnt aware as at today, but my sis husband have been begging me ever since up to few minutes ago and request that we c.My spirit is down, im weeping intermitently...how im i going to survive this momemt? Im gradually loosing my wife...a marriage of less than one year! ,im loosing the relationship with my sis husband....my sis marriage will also likely crash....and i asked myself...GOD WHY ME? Please all me in your prayers.

sunnydayasaba: I hardly comment, but after reading through I decided to comment on dis post, I see everybody advicing you to forgive ur wife and brother in law, but your forgetting something here, what about your own sister? Have u ever thought abt her too? Such guy can end up infecting ur sister wit deadly diseases because their is every tendency his going to continue cheating on ur sister with some other women aside ur own wife, what happens to her in that case? My friend, ur a victim and so is ur sister and as such, u must bring her into the matter, discuss with her and both of u can decide on the next line of action. The only thing u owe ur sister is protecting her and I think this is the right time to prove it. Dnt live wit the guilt of hiding such bad news frm her, cus if she finds out somehow that u knw abt it, she will never trust u again no matter how hard u try to convince her it was for gud. However, I think u need God intervention, I suggest u seek divine intervention, Talk to God in prayers. But no matter the outcome, no matter how hard u try to cover it up, Be ready for the worst jst incase it happens, But ur sister should know abt it,,cus she deserves to know.

All d best...My opinion though.

I agree with u. its so confusing cos of the web of issues which include:

1) My loving wife committed adultery without any reason according to her
2) This shameful act was done with my trusted friend,inlaw, and confidant
3) My sis is also involved in this issue cos her husband and my wife have betrayed her.

This becomes complicated. the most annoying thing is also that both my wife and her accompliance are insisting that they have no reason to do this and its not natural cos they dont undastand how it happened.I find it funny when people blame devil or unatural and the excuse for misguided behaviour

dmcdad: Dang! This is highly lugubrious. I know you must be in sixes and sevens at this juncture, completely gaga.

To be sincere with you, you are just not sharp at all. You are always with this guy whenever they exchange SMSs and you never noticed anything? And you were even blind from noticing from your wife too? Gosh! you know try at all. Anywayz, this is not about you.

I will view this the way I would react to it if I were in your shoes. Firstly, don’t have any beef sort of with the guy in question. Talk to him like nothing happened, but not lengthy anywayz, maybe greetings and the likes but make sure you guys are always on talking . Yet, you need to stay the heck away from him for life. Avoid his company when possible and make sure you are just limited to exchanging greetings with him to maintain the distance.

Secondly, if not for the fear of God, I would never have anything to do with a woman who is so strong-hearted as to hurt me. But, for the love and fear of God, there is always a re-think. So, my advice as regards your wife is; forgive her, but I know one thing is certain, your relationship with her can never be as strong as it were before now, at least for the time being. It is not easy to condone such from a partner especially when you are the kind that would never do that to her, it is something that would be very difficult to take as your life at this point in time would have taken a different turn. Even at that, I would en you to tread carefully and approach this matter with caution while taking cognizance of the love and forgiveness of the almighty God.


I know you have been hit hard and as such, it takes the grace of God to overcome this quandary. Please, be merciful to her. Alot of peeps on here would be quick to tell you to dump her asś bla bla bla, but in reality they fail to recognise the oath people take when they pledge their love for eachother "for better or for worse" when they get married. Do you think that phrase is only applicable in financial or economic situations alone? Nope! It applies to cases such as this too. Its an oath you took in the presence of God and you must fulfil it come what may. That is why divorce is never an option for me because of my ideology towards marriage and also guided by my level of morality, ethics and spirituality.

Forgive her, I know the mark will be engraved for long, but try to fight the thought and gradually let it die a natural death. With time, the trust you have towards her can be rebuilt, although that will take much conviction. At this juncture, she will have alot to prove to you. And one thing you need to take into knowledge is, don't give her whatever suspicious look towards anything. If she wants to go somewhere all alone or she wants to do something that doesn't require the both of you in it, free her and don't give her the impression that you are suspicious of every move she makes (even if you actually do). I tell you bruv, unless she is a devil, she would never hurt you in such a way anymore. You know why? Because she is human with a conscience and and would live with that guilt of betraying your love and trust once. I think it would place her in good stead never to do anything that is slightly related to cheating.

All the best brah... I pray God gives you the right mind to bear this gruesome and excruciating pain, and to also help you to hearken to my words. ! I gave this to you the way I would treat it myself if I were in your position, in total consideration of my values and the way I handle situations. So, you might choose to do it some other way you deem it fit.

Have a blissful day.

thnks for your honest advice. One very painful thing is also that twice they had sex in the same building i was too without really suspecting! we spend weekend in each others house including last weekend. they actually confessed to me that i was sleeping in the sitting room, my younger sis was in the room,the children are in there room, the betrayals were in the bathroom committing adultery!

Richfella:

My brother, on the surface, it appears that something terrible has happened to you.

But in reality, this could be one of the best things to ever happen to you. Kindly PM me.

I wish to see how this could be the best things ever to happen to me......pls tell me. Im still thinking of what to do...in the meantime, my wife is still with me but i have collected all her phones and make her incommuicado, i have also told her by her action she has waived her right as a wife..... I need God's guidiance in taking a final decision within the next couplees of days.

Note: for now i havent told my mum and my sis and her Dad too.

Boss13: How did you discover this?

How i discovered? I gave my wife my official phone when doesnt have one, she got another phone over the weekend and i wanted to retrieve mine. she was asleep when i got home and simply pick the phone fro her side attempting to change the sim wen an sms came in.Curiosity makes me open it( i dont check her phone normally) and went to her conversion which painted very sordid of there sexual encounter and professing deep love; all the while they were sending message to each other im always with this guy! I contronted her and she did not deny only crying and begging. i also sent sms to my sis husband ad he dint deny too and have started begging and expressing remorse

I never knew where to start this from, but will make it short as possible. I'm a professional I live and work in lagos, and I'm married to the woman of my dreams...a very young girl.I got married after so. Many intervention by people around me... Cos initially I see nothin important in holy matrimony. But for intervention of important people in ma life I won't have been seemingly happy married. One of this people include. My very own yyounger sister husband, we were so close, much more than inlaws we were like smae family and friend. Infact we establish business together.. Dear friends I just discovered. That my friend, inlaw, my business. Partner. That I always rely on and talk to about everything including my wife was actually sleeping wth my wife and they are proffessing love to eachother! My world came to an end. I'm sharttered,nothin maakes sese to me again. I can't imagine this level of double edge betrayal could happen to me thouth it was only a nollywood story. Now my wife is begging me to forgive her, my wife's mum was crying and begging to forgive her and not tell anyone else cos that will ruin her marriage too if. I let the father know.. I can no longer concentrate on anything and I skip work today.I still don't know what to do to survive this high level betrayals by my two most trusted persons! I'm at a crossroad.. What will I do?

Pls is there any update about this opening?

jodeci: Falcon petroleum is real,They have the franchise for ikorodu natural gas distribution and have been operating since 2006.

they supply natural gas to PZ,sunflag,spintex,nichemtex,dangote in ikorodu area.

Their head office is in Lekki.

I have worked for them before.

Thanx for ur assurance, why did u leave them? Is d environment not ok or the pay wasnt good?
www.falconpetro.com is their website.

1forall: OP did you send a job application for an ing position to an hhrss email address?

. Yes i did sent application to an hhrss and i got interview invite.

Please i want to know if anyone has information about this company falcon petroleum and falcon gas and power. Kindly share any info pls