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Gemma11's Posts 435t33

Gemma11's Posts

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Gemma11: 1:06pm On Aug 25, 2011
I just recently returned from Nigeria after years and was expecting to see a big improvement due to the positive comments I constantly read here on NL but not much has changed. . . .In fact things were a lot worst!

Case in point. I don’t like flying very much so as one would expect after an unavoidable 6 hour flight into MM, I chose the option of travelling by road to Sapele from Lagos. Now I have been on this journey before and I distinctly it only taking about 5-6 hours. . . . Lo and behold the journey now takes around 10+ hours because of the ridiculously bad road section at Ore, Ondo State.
How did the road deteriorate that much?

And don’t get me started on the light situation, the fact that no one is willing to risk their lives going once it gets dark as well as the fact that everyone expects a little something for doing what they have already been paid to do. i.e. We had already paid for our tickets but the driver of the bus still wanted all engers to contribute N300 each for so he could buy ‘fuel’ because he had to take another route to avoid the bad road at Ore Hello. . .You no know say you go take anoda route before? Abi did the road become bad yesterday?? I tire! It is things like this that make me glad that I don’t live in Nigeria. Imagine if a driver of a National Express Bus from Edinburgh to Manchester asking the engers who had already purchased their tickets to give him extra money because there was a bad road section on the M6??
Gemma11: 8:35pm On Aug 21, 2011
they need koboko
Gemma11: 6:49pm On Aug 21, 2011
what are they arguing about?
Gemma11: 7:00am On Aug 18, 2011
abbey.zach:

2 Bedroom Flat To let @Sabo Yaba

A massive siting room like a hall (250 white chairs space)
Master bedroom with a furnished bathroom with heater
the other room with normal toilet/bathroom stuff

A massive rug in the siting room
bed
A big book shelve, all these for 50K/optional

N650,000.00/annum,
07026787949



Why are the living rooms so big? This a two bed property so possibly suitable for a family of four; max 5. Why the need for a living room to contain 250 chairs?
Gemma11: 10:14pm On Aug 17, 2011
I am interested in this property. Could you send me the details to [email protected]? I would also like to know some information about the area and its local amenities. transportation, shops etc
How much rent per year can I expect once the property has been completed?
I don't know Lagos very well but how far is it from Ikeja, Ketu or Surelere?
Gemma11: 9:23pm On Jul 04, 2011
HI

I am also having the same issue. Can't find where I need to pay for the visa as the website appears to lead to a dead end. I was told they don't take cash at the embassy and so I am reluctant to turn up there without proof that I have paid.

Please help!!

How much is the visa anyway? I was told $144 plus a £20 processing fee. Then as well as completing the form online I have to also the form, fill that in as well and they submit that to the embassy, sounds very complicated, long winded and very expensive.
Gemma11: 2:43pm On May 31, 2011
dustydee:

were people able to communicate when mobile phones were shut down?if yes via what means?is it available in Nigeria? Have you heard about emergency numbers? do we have them in Nigeria? if yes what are the numbers and have you ever tried them? Please lets compare akpu to akpu and not akpu to pounded yam.

Nobody could communicate via mobile phones for about two hours after the bombs went off. Only landlines were working. Also the tube, which is said to be the veins off London was entirely shut down as were most buses or trains. I walked until my legs nearly felly off that day.
I think if the government has a genuine cause for concern over the safety of its people then they should do all they can to ensure it and if they means shutting down vital networks at key notice then so be it
Gemma11: 2:07pm On May 31, 2011
I all the mobile phone services being shut down in the UK on July 7th 2005 when the tube bombs happened. Sometimes it is a necessity in order to save lives and most cases it has to happen immediately so no warnings.
Gemma11: 12:40pm On Mar 29, 2011
What are the positive attributes of your people, be they Yoruba, Hausa, Igbo, Urhobo, Itsekiri, Edo etc?

What is their normal style of dress?

What are their key traditions?

Post pictures if necessary?

Lets keep this thread positive.

ONE NIGERIA!!!!!

I will be back soon to post some information and pics about my culture - Okpe. Although I will warn you beforehand that I am not that much familiar with it since I live in the West. I am eager to learn though so any fellow Okpes, please feel free to help a sister out!
Gemma11: 4:48pm On Mar 21, 2011
Congratulations to Oge! She could have had the baby anywhere though and it would have been a full British citizen.

I know this because several of my relatives have given birth to British Citizens in Nigeria and these children have been issued with full British ports by the British Embassy in Nigeria.

I suspect Oge wanted to take advantage of free NHS health care which is wrong in a way as she doesn't live in UK and so does not pay taxes. I say this because Queen Elizabeth is not a private hospital. Just speculation on my part so don't jump on me. grin
Gemma11: 6:13pm On Feb 25, 2011
Seun:

Then maybe you should let the offended African Americans speak for themselves? wink

I was just trying to explain why this was newsworthy in the west and especially why black people in the West found this imagery offensive. That plus I did mention that it relates to the whole of the black Diaspora which doesn't just encom African Americans.

That being said did I mention that I was offended.
Gemma11: 5:01pm On Feb 25, 2011
Freesia:

It's a clash of cultures I guess undecided to us Africans she is decorated and ready to get her dance on for some event (with a better outfit though ) and to you African Americans it brings back bad memories sad

But she is suppose to be paying a tribute to Fela and his dancers, that is Yoruba culture. Did Fela's dancers ever blacken their face like that? Do Yoruba's Blacken thier faces like that? Some ethnic groups use face paint to decorate thier faces which can be akin to make up but they don't blacken their faces like that. Africans like African Americans, especially Nigerians come in all shades too. Some are seeing it as though Beyonce is saying that she is not really a Black girl and has to blacken her face to look like one of us and by doing so she is using one of the most offensive iconic images in Black Diaspora history.

This is why it is offensive.

By the way I am not African American.
Gemma11: 4:10pm On Feb 25, 2011
JustGood:

methinks Gemma is refusing to see reason lipsrsealed

This boy is obviously another of the "very many" Nigerian-born miscreants in London who get into the wrong things in order to prove that they are now abroad. Many of them up with wild Jamaicans etc. It is a well known phenomenon within the Nigerian communities in the London area. He played the system to try and stay in the UK because of a fear the unknown in Nigeria. He is back in Nigeria and he is having fun again, having met other kids his age. His mother, however, has paid a huge price for him to live a decent life.

I read somewhere that he twitters everyday about what he does in Nigeria now.

The British system is pathetic in respect of parenting and the laws surrounding it.



From his tweets it appears he is back in London?

Sorry approaching a gay organisation when you are not gay is odd. It is like a white person goign to an Asian organisation for help, doesn't make sense.

What happened to the other thread in Travel?
Gemma11: 1:45pm On Feb 25, 2011
@gohome

I'm a straight female. Check your facts on HIV. Homosexual is extremely risky that is why in the 80s, HIV was known as a gay man's disease and from what I have seen now there isn't much different. Only they don't refer to it in that way because it can also be gotten through heterosexual relations but the percentages are low. . .as are the percentages of a woman giving it to a man. ( I am not saying that it does not happen but that percentages are higher in gay men especially in the West.

@Dreamchaser
Sorry I don't think a gay man can be changed and wouldn't want to risk my life trying to find out. This is why you have so many undercover gay men out there today, especially in the black community.
Gemma11: 1:42pm On Feb 25, 2011
It may not mean anything to many Nigerians who are not familar with Black History in the West but to us, especially African Americans it is highly offensive.

Back in the day when Blacks were hardly allowed on a film set, white people would often don a black face to portray a black person character. Not only that, these portrayals were always stupid, dumb and illiterate. These were the only images of Black people seen on TV and the black face has now somewhat become synonymous with a time when Black people were treated less than human and treated a certain way based on a stereotype.

Beyonce, as an African American should have known better.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blackface
Gemma11: 2:55pm On Feb 23, 2011
@Dreamchaser

I also have no problem with homosexuals otherwise I wouldn't be here defending Edirin's choices. However sleeping with a man who has indulged in homosexual activity and who is likely to continue to do so undercover while in sham relationships with women is extremely risky healthwise.

It was only the other day I was watching a show on Oprah where a lady had contracted HIV from her husband who had been sleeping with men on the downlow while being married to her. There are many ladies who have the same story to tell and many have also died from AIDS.

Just in case you didn't know the risk of getting HIV is significantly higher between homosexual men than they are in heterosexual relationships between a man and a woman.

Loving someone else is one thing but you should love yourself more not to put yourself at risk. Given what I know, Ii would never put myself or loved ones at risk of being married to a man like that because I don't believe that they can change and even if they tell you they have then they are probably doing it behind closed doors.

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Why-Bridget-Sued-Her-Husband-for-12-Million-Dollars

Also google Eddie Long and Ted Haggard.

I am not judging these men but I don't think they should live a lie at the risk of hurting others.
Gemma11: 1:26pm On Feb 23, 2011
Dream chaser:

@Gemma11, sadly, I can see you are one of the brain washed ones. Too bad you don't believe in redemption. Atleast, you must have met some bisexual men right?


So you are sayign that you would willingly and knowingly marry a man that was previously a homosexual or would have no problems betrothing your daughter to such a man??

I wouldn't.

@Sagamite

I didn't read all you said but I got the gist of it.

In English law 17 year old Edirin's wishes take precedence over his mothers. The facts are that Edirin is still in with his British lawyers and has made his wishes very clear; He doesn't want to be in Nigeria and doesnt want to go to school in Nigeria. Edirin also states that he is being beaten and made to go through exorcisms and wants to come back to England where he has a place at college to do his A'levels.

If Mrs Erhire refuses to comply with the law of the land she chose to live in then she should go back to Nigeria. Simple as ABC!

As for Edririn, he will be 18 in a few weeks and so no doubt he will be be back in England with the help of the British Embassy unless he is unlawfully arrested by Nigerian immigration again.
Gemma11: 2:20pm On Feb 21, 2011
Dream chaser:

This is a devilish society. That woman is great. She made a sacrifice for her sons future that an oyinbo would never understand. For those of u who think once gay always gay, I know a guy who was very gay when growing up but now he is straight. The woman has a right to protect her child from all this evil influences. Homosexualism is a wrong choice ppl get to make and get addicted to, but with help they can change. God bless his mama! Let him stay in 9ja, u would see a diff cos he won't meet brainwashers here.


That's disgusting! What woman in her right mind would lay down with a man that has been exploring another man's backside!

Once a gay always a gay. Gay's may get married and pretend they are straight but then they probably having discreet homosexual liaisons on the side. Definetly not worth it.

Besides Nigeria is not a safe place for a gay man
Gemma11: 2:15pm On Feb 21, 2011
*Sigh*

I wish people would at least apply a bit of common sense before wearing their patrirotism cloak and crying victimg. There facts are there and clear as day.

The boy with his own free will approached a gay organisation for help. They didn't seek him out

This gay organisation regularly deals with young teens who have come out of the closet, especially those from families with strong cultural values who may consider having  a gay son an embarassment.

This gay organisation regularly deals with gay men from all cultures and ethnic groups who fear that they may be made to get married in order to cure their homosexual afflictions.

This organisation normally aids the trouble individuals to file court orders to protect their human rights.

Given those fact, Edirin's story, whether he is pretending to be gay or not is not unrealistic to these people and they would have given him the benefit of the doubt.

This organisation has probably heard the same story before as may the Judge in question. The article below states that there have been a rise in forced marriage orders for gay men - including those with African backgrounds so there is a clear precedence in this case.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/jul/01/gay-men-forced-marriage

The Judge is not going to waste time investigating whether gay men are forced to marry in Nigeria. Their only concern is Edirin's human rights and Mrs Erhire was implicat in breaching the order in place.


http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/cms/14490.htm
to prevent a forced marriage from occurring
to hand over ports
to stop intimidation and violence
to reveal the whereabouts of a person
to stop someone from being taken abroad
Gemma11: 8:11pm On Feb 18, 2011
I agree with Eldee grin

The Court has a duty to protect a minor who has made a claim of forced marriage and that is all they are concerned about. It is not up to the Courts to start doing research into forced marriages in the Urhobo ethnic group.
Gemma11: 7:32pm On Feb 18, 2011
Hey BusyBody

I did get it but you didn't get me. I understand your friends are straight but claimed to be gay in order to go to the top of the waiting list. Meanwhile those that didn't had to wait longer. You say that you were the same age as Edirin when you experienced this, 17. So the reason why I said that those who claimed gay to get a council flat asap rather than wait on the list had no choice was because they nowhere else to go because back then it was still the Council's responsibilty to house homeless 17 year olds, gay or not. I think that is still the case now but not sure.

Edirin's case is different. I notice you bring up seeking asylum and what not Edirin is a legal resident of the UK with indefinite leave to remain. He was not making a case against Immigration so I don't know why you brought up honour killings, ayslum etc. He is a teenager, old enough to move out of his parents house, get a job and even get married. Do you understand that he could have simply moved out of his parents house, ed the army, taken his UK port and ran away from home etc? He did none of those things instead he chose to go to a gay organisation that helps troubled teens to seek help to make a claim against his parents.

Please excuse typos above- using phone.
Gemma11: 5:48pm On Feb 18, 2011
^^@BusyBody
Maybe because those who claimed they were gay didn't have a choice. Edirin did and there are other non gay organisations that could have done have also helped him apply for the same 'forced marriage order' or a 'child protection order' as he could have gone to them as a straight man and still said the same thing.
Gemma11: 5:20pm On Feb 18, 2011
Sagamite:

You came to the conclusion that forced marriage is realistic in a region that does not have a record of practicing it based on the fact that some people mentioned someone should marry? Are you having a laff?

You are conveniently forgetting to factor in the gay issue.

I don't know why you are acting brand new. So you can honestly say that if an Nigerian found out that their son was gay and was sleeping around with different men, the idea to marry them off at asap wouldn't even enter the equation? Come one get real!

I'm Urhobo, and I know my people will do anything to save face of having a gay son.
Gemma11: 5:15pm On Feb 18, 2011
What I told you was a gay argument carries more weight, and most UK youths will know that.

Sorry there is no other reason why a street wise black teenager in the UK would go to gay organisation unless they were really gay.

I have heard of illegal immigrants and asylum guys going down that route out of desperation but not  a teenage kid who has indefinite leave to remain in the UK.
Gemma11: 5:10pm On Feb 18, 2011
In this case it doesn't matter if the 'thought' would really be carried out. The fact is that it is possible. The other day I heard a man say that if he found out his son was gay the first thing he would do would be to lock him up with three prostitutes in a hopes to 'cure' him. There are also plenty s of gay men in Africa who say their families are pressurising them to get married. I don't understand why you are conveniently excluding the gay equation and the fact that Edirin sought the help of the gay organisation; They didn't seek him.

All Edirin had to do to apply for the order and state why he felt it necessary and whether you like it or not claiming to be gay and being scared of being sent back to Africa for marriage is realistic.

The judge is not going to hand out a forced marriage order just for the sake of it as there are other order orders that could have had the same legal hold as the forced marriage one.
Gemma11: 4:47pm On Feb 18, 2011
Busy_body:



Gbam. And this presentation rules out the gay argument in one fell swoop, because if he was gay he would not be staying out late exposing himself to the undesirable bigotted elements out there.



So you don't think it is a bit wierd that this guy byed orgs like Childline or the NSPCC which could have easily assisted him in filing for a another type of civic order to protect his rights and specifically chose an organisation that specialises in ing the rights of gay teens instead? How do you explain that.

Further more the statement on Sahara reporters is just a press release and shouldn't be taken as the Gospel.

Sagamite:

It is in the sahara reporter link I posted above.

It would be an impossible task to ask you for evidence of the bolded above, so I am going to be fair and ask you for your word only: Have you ever seen such Forced Marriage in Urhobo land?



I have a cousin who was gay and the first solution the Elders in the village thought would cure the problem was marriage.

In regards to approaching a gay organisation, any street-wise kid in London would be aware of the weight a gay argument will carry under the courts and might exploit it. His approaching one is not some solid evidence.

But Edirin could have gone to another non -gay organisation and got a similar type of civic order to protect his rights and had nothing to do with marriage. That is my point.
Gemma11: 4:30pm On Feb 18, 2011
@Sagamite
Well can you understand that the fact the child may be gay makes the 'forced marriage' claim realistic?
Gemma11: 4:23pm On Feb 18, 2011
The fact he approached a organisation that s gay teens speaks volumes.

I am Urhobo and I know the culture well. That being said I wouldn't put it past an Urhobo family to marry of their gay son asap in the hope to 'cure' him. Therefore the forced marrage claim by the boy is believable.

He has been in Nigeria for months but I read a press release that stated that Edirin has said he is being beaten and made to undergo exorcisms.  - I am concerned about these and feel that the boy should be brought so he can testify as to what is really going on.

You keep saying that he 'played' the system. Well if he was clever enough to 'play' the system then how comes he willingly got on the plane to Nigeria? A lot of things don't make sense but the fact remains he byed all other other child help organisations and went to gay one and said that he feared he would be sent to Nigeria and forced to marry possibly because he is gay.
Gemma11: 4:08pm On Feb 18, 2011
@sagamite
The fact is that he is a ward of the court and he is one because he approached a gay organisation on his own free will for help. This is the UK. If a 17 year old goes to an organisation and the courts for help he will be given the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise.

It was the mother against her son and basically she should have taken steps to prove that here was nothing to worry about instead of showing blatant disregard for the law of the land she chose to live in and taking him out of the country.
Gemma11: 4:01pm On Feb 18, 2011
r231:

Does anyone actually blame the mother in this?

I would do the same if I think any of my kids were going down a smilar path.

The boy will not be forced to marry anyone, that is just a lie




If the child is gay no amount of beatings, exorcisms and being in Nigeria will make him straight.

The parents were silly, not to mention ignorant to openly defy a court order and take a ward of the UK courts to Nigeria without seeking permission first.

The mother chose to live in England and so she should respect the law of the land. Its simple. If she were against the order there was nothing to stop her from getting her own solicitors to challenge it.

1 Like

Gemma11: 3:54pm On Feb 18, 2011
@Sagamite.

Edirin is a ward of the courts and the parents had no right to take him out of the country.

This is my response to you in the other thread.

@Sagamite

I believe that this child is really gay. Why else would he have gone straight to an organisation that s gay teens and overlooked the other ones such as Childline or the NSPCC? At age 14 a child in the UK has the legal right to divorce their parents and so at 17 all Edirin would have to do was to gain from the numerous child help organisations in the UK and gotten any type of order to prevent his parents taking him against his will to Nigeria.

It doesn't make any sense.

Given that fact the 'forced marriage' belief by Edirin is probably genuine as are the claims of excorcisms and beatings.

The Law of the Land is not silly. Don't you think that they are aware of the fact that thousands of Nigerians and other non UK citizens based in the UK relocate their kids to their home countries each year? My own parents did this and I am sure you probably know of some cases too. You need to ask yourself why this case in particular has attracted a jail sentence.

Edirin was probably being bullied at school for being gay too.

From what I gather, this has everything to do with Edirin being gay and the fact that Edirin himself approached the gay organisation to help and they are now the ones in court fighting for his human rights. Its that straight forward.
Gemma11: 3:38pm On Feb 18, 2011
@Sagamite

I believe that this child is really gay. Why else would he have gone straight to an organisation that s gay teens and overlooked the other ones such as Childline or the NSPCC? At age 14 a child in the UK has the legal right to divorce their parents and so at 17 all Edirin would have to do was to gain from the numerous child help organisations in the UK and gotten any type of order to prevent his parents taking him against his will to Nigeria.

It doesn't make any sense.

Given that fact the 'forced marriage' belief by Edirin is probably genuine as are the claims of excorcisms and beatings.

The Law of the Land is not stupid. Don't you think that they are aware of the fact that thousands of Nigerians and other non UK citizens based in the UK relocate their kids to their home countries each year? My own parents did this and I am sure you probably know of some cases too. You need to ask yourself why this case in particular has attracted a jail sentence.

Edirin was probably being bullied at school for being gay too.

From what I gather, this has everything to do with Edirin being gay and the fact that Edirin himself approached the gay organisation to help and they are now the ones in court fighting for his human rights. Its that straight forward.

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