NewStats: 3,260,962 , 8,172,917 topics. Date: Wednesday, 28 May 2025 at 03:08 AM 1v1r57

Good evening follow Nairalanders, I trust we all have a blessed day.

I am a 31 year old man, a graduate, descent, very hard working, a core gentleman and any lady's dream man in of physique. I have been working all my life even before going to school and I also worked to sponsor myself through the university so I have always depended on myself through life until I lost my job some few months back.

I met this lady who is about 5 years older than me last year through a friend who introduced me to her because my then relationship was about hitting the rock, it eventually did. I live in Abuja while this lady lives in Warri, we got along quickly, I visited her a couple of times just to know her better and I must say she is a nice person and a wife material. She has two ed companies that are doing very well and her family have been very ive of our relationship part because we are from the same community and they all are waiting for us to announce our wedding date. She do go out of her way to make me happy especially now that I have lost my job, she has sent me money in six figures on several occasions in form of assistance, she indeed has a gud heart and very independent. I respect her a lot

My main issue now is that I don't love her not because she is not a nice person but because we operate on different levels entirely, while I am an extrovert she on the other hand is an introvert, she allows me to take decisions in almost all issues that I have concerns us when she is supposed to contribute and even suggest superior ideas, but I feel she is been over submissive just to please me and I so dislike this about her, I see it as a form of desperation to let me have my way always in the name of marriage, she dresses moderately but I like hot ladies, she is a university graduate but doesn't behave or act like one, she is the direct opposite of my kind of lady.

I have not introduce her to my family even though she has been disturbing me to, but she do talk with them on phone on regular basis and I strongly believe my dad and some of my siblings will be against our union because of the age difference and some other things.

My people, what do I do and how do I go about it because all she want now is marriage and nothing more. I don't want to hurt her, she has told me her life will collaps if I ever leave her. Please I need you advice, try to be civil about it I beg of you. Thanks

Mod please help me push it to the front page because it is very urgent

If only you didn't get involved in this. It's a dicey situation here...I can't give a sound advise.

well it is better to leave now than to regret later

Chai.....why i no go Bible class today sef?

Awon stories yii sha

rubbush story, who cares

I don't know which kind of advice to give you now

oga its clear u don't love this lady from all you stated above... u mentioned her good qualities and all but still you don't love her Na, so why are u still with her..
see your age difference sef, please leave the poor lady alone don't waste more of her time she is not getting younger.

Guy, sometimes nature don't present to us what we think is ideal for us... I will advice u to stick to her & brush her to ur taste.

Op u hv enter dis one oh

first u hv giving her d impression that u love her.
U hv visited her family nd they like u nd they believe u guys will end up together.
Op i don't see any tin bad about dis particular girl ur major worries is her age....

My advice is to seat down think, seek advice nd pray.

Dis particular girl could change yr life for good.

diehardanusfan:
rubbush story, who cares

Thanks for stopping by

My God SMH 4 op

So in a nutshell, u need an extrovert, d happening gal, chick n classy babe dah wen u talk 1, she don spit 100, not d kul headed kinda gal. I av plenty tinz to say buh since u said kip it civil i'd jst kip it short

Be careful of what u wish 4 cuz u myt jst get it. D devil u knw is beta dan d angel u don't.

Gudluck

ojun50:
Op u hv enter dis one oh

first u hv giving her d impression that u love her.
U hv visited her family nd they like u nd they believe u guys will end up together.
Op i don't see any tin bad about dis particular girl ur major worries is her age....

My advice is to seat down think, seek advice nd pray.

Dis particular girl could change yr life for good.

Thank you

I am always having this at the back of my mind : don't bite what you cannot swallow .

The honourable thing to do is to leave her.

If her life collapse, God will gather it back for her.

In other news, I sincerely hate that crap that people pull so that someone won't leave them.

The greatest bull.shit is telling someone you can't live without them.

Die na....

She dresses moderately but you prefer hot ladies? Instagram big girls abi?

The girls seems like the old fashioned kinda girl any man would love to have as a better half
She is independent, has a stable career path and very endearing!
She deserves better and you are not even good enough.

Ghen Ghen

What kinda advice do you want again?
Break up with her already and stop wasting her time, she deserves to be with a man that truly loves her and in a way you're hindering that.

And the lady is there thinking she has a fiancee

Dude!! Let her go
It's obvious you don't have a thing for her

To even think I'm guilty of the said offence

The bitter truth is you aren't good enough for her.

Op after you Don chop her millions , na now you know say u know love her but you bin love her millions... Op you must marry her o... If she swear for you, you go know say difference dey between acid and icecream

sagitariusbaby:

Mod please help me push it to the front page because it is very urgent

You're quite a wicked fellow, aren't you? You know you don't love her yet you have been collecting money from her. You say you don't love her yet you have given her the impression that your relationship is heading somewhere, hence her mindset. Even if she has being deliberately ignoring all the signs, you failed to define your relationship with her seeing that time is no longer on her side and now the poor lady thinks your relationship is heading to the altar.

Mr Man you're an evil time waster. Ladies ought to pray against men like you.

Do whatever you want to do but don't marry her and make her life miserable. She deserves a better man than you.

From experience, 2 extroverts dont blend well.... i dont wish to be in d ladies shoes sha ooo...

but id say age is just a number (no one shld eva tel me dis personally, id shoot ur brains)

She was the rebound and you are a punk for not telling her that that's what she is/was. Wimp!

Op when u were collecting and swallowing the six digits, she pays into your ,u no say u no love her.

Well tell her the truth and breakup with her, later u wil realise karma is real and no be every giftsand money person dey swallow. The kind of half unclad girls u are craving for , wil show you life is not for the faint hearted.

So ungrateful.

There are two things. Whether anything is wrong with the lady. What you want. There is nothing wrong with her. Age, introversion, etc, are nonsense. They are not all that important. At least, there is nothing you can't sort out - "Baby, you know, it'd really be great if you contribute your ideas more to issues in this relationship." But, unfortunately, she isn't what you want. This is something I can relate with since the women I have wanted most are not necessarily the ones with the best characters. You have wronged her by eating her money knowing she isn't your "type". Unfortunately, that is common these days, as most people around here have no values, morals or self-respect.

What you should do? Only you can decide that. But one sure thing is to call it quits with her and stop wasting her time. If she's prone to drama she may go naked at midnight and lay curses on you for eating her six digits and wasting her time. I don't know whether such things work or not, but you have to countenance the possibility; after all, you may have drawn the rain with your own hands. Or you can take another good look at her, think of what attracted you to her, focus on her good qualities and marry her. Seeing how selfish you are, I know you're likely to choose the first option.

Good luck.

You see a very good girl; deep within, you know she is good and should be taken home to mama. But she is not as flashy as your babes. She is not a girl-about-town. She is not from a rich background. That man is godly, decent, doesn't sleep in night clubs, has a great vision for his future, focused in his career, loves to cook and stay close to his family. But he's not as stylish as you want 'em. He doesn't have that six-pack and broad shoulders. Now, you have decided to look elsewhere. You must marry someone who will stay above your friends' wives when it comes to beauty and style. Her legs must be straight, lips thick, light-skinned (more reasons our black beauties are going for acid bath and pouring chemicals they call cream on their body), and with good curves. You must be able to flaunt him before friends. He must have some good rides and be able to sponsor vacations...even if he gives you black eyes on weekly basis. The things that would eventually matter don't matter now. Don't worry, I hope those friends will be there when you start seeing that hell you want to see. It's good to ire outward beauty, but there is more to marriage than outward beauty. A beautiful woman is more beautiful inside and in the home. You are after his height, bank , Queen's English, and broad shoulders today; there is more to a man than all those things you are after. Go for what matters. Don't the group of men/women crying "all women/men are bad". God has given you the signs today...
This is for everyone

Does this story exist? I doubt

if you want to leave her, do it

you don't love her it's better you leave her now than having a failed marriage
trust me nothing would happen to her. I thought I wouldn't be able to live without my ex but here am I doing perfectly fine without him.

The longer this goes on the more intense the expectations will get. Now if you have gone and sampled her pleasures your have dug an even bigger hole. She thinks she is your grirlfriend from what you described quite rightly so. You led her down that path.Besides you are not a very nice person, you have no problems accepting her money and other help she offers she does this because she cares. This is not fair to the lady do the descent thing and set her free. Your intentions are not honourable towards her as are only thinking of yourself.

I believe no one else can save you but yourself.

I get lost wen I see full grown adults not smart enough to figure what they really want in life and go for it.

U played game with her heart and also wasted her time, I am sure nemesis has a way of catching up with people that act this way.

We are responsible for 90% of woteva is happening to us, reason I hardly pity pple wen they get into marital mess. If u av issues somtyms later in ur marriage to ur outgoing, ever blazing gal, it would be as a result of u not knowing ur right from left as old as u are.

Please allow d lady to go, for another man with focus/direction to be able to locate her.

I pray for God grace to help her move ahead without you.... She obviously deserves more