NewStats: 3,262,365 , 8,176,940 topics. Date: Monday, 02 June 2025 at 01:18 AM 164j3k

TV01:

For those from patriarchal or "son-preference" societies, the cultural imperative to have a son is undeniably strong and compelling - and can literally break homes and ruin marriages. The desperation for sons is strong - for both men and women. Thanks Lezz.

Indeed, for many - even in cultures, or for people, where there is no such imperative - the simple desire can also be quite deep. Dreams of taking your son to the match, or him growing into a striker for Arsenal, always seem that much more probable - if no less likely - when you have one. Is it beyond the bounds of possibility that men and women both have dreams of, and for their sons and daughter?

I always wanted a son and was beside myself when I asked the nurse to "scan and tell jor", and it was a boy. I couldn't contain myself, ran out and told everyone. Wifey was livid !

He is so handsome I told wife to deliver "4 more like that". When the second one was on the way - and yes I wanted another son - wifey banned scanning , but I was sure it was a boy. When this orange looking thing came out crying her eyes out, I almost choked, but managed to hide my disappointment from my wife.

Now? Sure I wouldn't mind more sons, but I wouldn't swap my daughter for any number of them. Dealt with again! Thank you Lord .

I'm personally happy that the cultural imperative is changing, but we won't ever be able to trammel human desire. Agreeing or disagreeing with your post will not change that.

Siena, you had two girls and then a boy - and I've heard you say "as long as it's a healthy child" and all - but be honest with us - if you don't mind sharing;

1. Weren't you made up when you had a son?
2. With hindsight would you have been just as happy if you'd had another girl?


TV

just when i was about to pretend not give to a fvck whatever sex comes out eventually, i saw your fourth line.that's so unfair....been having those fantasies of me and me little boy going for such moments really... and am yet to even get married. there are still very much alot of people who wish more that that birth is male child.this is more so for the many more different reasons male children have been preferred.

Bukatyne tell me the meaning of that name,is it same as Nike?

bukatyne:
@knightngale:

While there might be no 'advantage' of having male sons (as wives & kids now bear the first name of their husbands; husbands change the family name on religious grounds; women sometimes hyphenate their fathers & husband's surnames), every parent desires both sex children and the drive for same sex child aka mini me is also very strong.

Now we see gender barriers crossed societally still nothing beats a son a father can mold to be greater than him... Nothing like a father having his replica to carry the torch of his ideals to the next generation.

I wonder how mothers with only boys cope; (I know one who cried her eyes out in the DR when her last was a boy) I must have a morenikeji... a daughter I can pour myself into and watch grow from a baby to a woman of virtue.

So bearing a male child/ the desire to bear a male child will forever be relevant.

makes sense

crackhaus:

Sons tend to have a stronger affection for their moms, is this good enough for you?

it's not about me. It is true though, but the female child shows more care.

Ewuro4:
TV01... 'Orange looking thing' It's amazing they're always orange or pink. Your last paragraph is powerful. Glad to see I'm not the only parent with that thought. How you dey?

@Topic, I don't know what to say. I have all girls and this weird thought always cross my mind; if I would be satisfied if one of them suddenly turned into a boy.. My honest answer is always No.

Though always wanted to balance my family with a boy but I've come to a resolution that this is my destiny , but then again, I'm a girl myself and have been nothing but the best thing that has ever happened to my parents, their expectations of me are met above & beyond their imagination, and my maiden name es on with me.

This is funny , my oldest asked her daddy if she can keep her family name in future and his response was 'yes, your mom did and that'll make me very happy' . Aww

awwww cute

itstpia8:


In other words, all the ones you know of (and the context for your thread), are Nigerian.

stop asking questions, shut da Bleep up already.

Knightngale:
it's not about me. It is true though, but the female child shows more care.

Not necessarily true, when there are no females. The boys fit in just fine.

byvan03:



Not necessarily true, when there are no females. The boys fit in just fine.

ok, when there are no males, do you think the females fit in just fine?

Knightngale:
ok, when there are no males, do you think the females fit in just fine?

Any child fits in wherever the parents want the child to fit, do you think otherwise?

byvan03:
To be honest that mother is a drama queen. Boys are easier to understand and deal with, I won't miss not talking about menstruation, boys/pregnancy this n that and all those yucky gists. Nah to shift these ones go their papa side for solutions biko. Me no get strength for tactical approach 101. As for inheritance and other related angles, that part no concern me jare. Our society isn't favourable to ladies, nature isn't too, a daughter will make me think too much . Am too protective, what will I do if my daughter comes with sob stories? Things like this worry me a lot because my solution will be come home to mama .

I agree 100% with this

Boys are so easy to get along with. they just want to play and be happy. No mood swings, no keeping malice. You can spank him now and 5mins later you are back playing rough.

.

.

my question goes to you mr op, of what value or benefit are you to your family now that you are a MALE CHILD sir??pls REPLY US ON THIS FORUM

byvan03:
Bukatyne tell me the meaning of that name,is it same as Nike?

Morenikeji is 'I have seen a second/replica/soulmate'

A daughter is her mother's morenikeji.... A husband can be the wife's morenikeji dependent on the context.

byvan03:



To be honest that mother is a drama queen. Boys are easier to understand and deal with, I won't miss not talking about menstruation, boys/pregnancy this n that and all those yucky gists. Nah to shift these ones go their papa side for solutions biko. Me no get strength for tactical approach 101. As for inheritance and other related angles, that part no concern me jare. Our society isn't favourable to ladies, nature isn't too, a daughter will make me think too much . Am too protective, what will I do if my daughter comes with sob stories? Things like this worry me a lot because my solution will be come home to mama .

Lols!

I have heard some mothers say that too.

I love a morenikeji o!

I agree a teen girl is an effective sleepless pill.

I guess male kids are as relevant as the family makes them.

Bolade005:
Before I got married, I told my wife I want just 2kids hoping she'd reproduce two boys or a girl and a boy. Now that I have two girls, even though all is well, deep down I do yearn for a boy and I know we are going to try again and I seriously hope and pray the next turns out to be a boy.

Truth is, I love my girls, I love them with all my heart but somehow I know i'd be incomplete without a son.

Do you know how to tilt the odds in favour of having a male child?It is God who determines what sex the child would be but science has shown that there are a few things you could do to increase the odds of having the sex you desire.
You could let me know if you need the info.

bukatyne:


Lols!

I have heard some mothers say that too.

I love a morenikeji o!

I agree a teen girl is an effective sleepless pill.

I deal with teen girls on daily basics so I have an idea of what's like to have them around. There is nothing I won't do to protect my female child, so everyone is safer that I don't have one to protect.


Girls are so adorable, but I rather not have them. Let mine remain safe wherever they are. No one will come to my house yarning some gibberish about seeing ripe agbalumo just to take away my child. Then what if she doesn't have balls to deal with life issues? She will call me crying when hurt abi? That will shatter my heart, I just can't, maybe God knows that I can't deal. I pray it remains as it is.

byvan03:




I deal with teen girls on daily basics so I have an idea of what's like to have them around. There is nothing I won't do to protect my female child, so everyone is safer that I don't have one to protect.


Girls are so adorable, but I rather not have them. Let mine remain safe wherever they are. No one will come to my house yarning some gibberish about seeing ripe agbalumo just to take away my child. Then what if she doesn't have balls to deal with life issues? She will call me crying when hurt abi? That will shatter my heart, I just can't, maybe God knows that I can't deal. I pray it remains as it is.

You seem to only focus on protecting girls as if females are invalid Your perception is so weird. You deal with girls as you claim, but you can't see past the need to protect them from who? Boys? Boys also need to be guided too so they don't fall into gangs and vices. Train up a child in the way he or she should go, and they will never depart from it.

I find girls quite comionate and especially caring to elderly parents. When you have to depend on your daughter-in-laws for care in old age you will understand this.

Pidggin:


You seem to only focus on protecting girls as if females are invalid Your perception is so weird. You deal with girls as you claim, but you can't see past the need to protect them from who? Boys? Boys also need to be guided too so they don't fall into gangs and vices. Train up a child in the way he or she should go, and they will never depart from it.

I find girls quite comionate and especially caring to elderly parents. When you have to depend on your daughter-in-laws for care in old age you will understand this.

Money can buy care, it doesn't have to be your DILS. I don't know about you but to me, yes, girls need protecting. What I claimed still made me see 1million reasons why they need protection and exactly what their parents were trying to do which left them in my care. Who said boys shouldn't be raised or protected? You are the one with the weird perception here because your eagerness to twist and turn my perception won't even let you it that a girl is mostly at the losing end when shi*ts go down . Believe what you want to believe but you surely do know the reality which is far steeper than your fantasy world .


You can be the flag bearer and lead the match so girls can bare their chests without tops, after all they are no different from boys. Do you have a daughter? If you don't feel that need to protect her then it's a problem.


Is always better to just respects people 's perception and state yours, I am very protective and will be much more so with a daughter. If its weird to you, your weird is my normal then. Why can't you also see past the fact that a boy can be more caring than a girl or you don't know boys are comionate too?

byvan03:




Money can buy care, it doesn't have to be your DILS. I don't know about you but to me, yes, girls needs protecting. Yes , what I claimed still made me see 1million reasons why they need protection. Who say boys shouldn't be raised or protect? You are the one with the weird perception here because your eagerness to twist and turn my perception won't even let you it that a girl is mostly at the losing end when shi*ts go down . Believe what you want to believe but you surely do know the reality which is far steeper than your fantasy world .


You can be the flag bearer and lead the match so girls can bare their chests without tops, after all they are no different from boys. Do you have a daughter?If you don't feel that need to protect her then it's a problem.

The care that money will buy you is from some else's daughter If they were scared to raise a girl because she needs only protection, how would she become a responsible, nurturing adult to take care of you?

All children need protection, not just girls, and it's not the only thing they need, they also need care, love, stability, etc. Your own nanny can molest your son, your neighbors can also do same.

I will feel the need to protect my kids whether boy or girl. But this is not entirely what having kids should be about, good luck.

Pidggin:


The care that money will buy you is from some else's daughter If they were scared to raise a girl because she needs only protection, how would she become a responsible, nurturing adult to take care of you?

All children need protection, not just girls, and it's not the only thing they need, they also need care, love, stability, etc. Your own nanny can molest your son, your neighbors can also do same.

I will feel the need to protect my kids whether boy or girl. But this is not entirely what having kids should be about.

Who said the carer must be a girl? If you read carefully and not in a hurry to jump on the post you would have read clearly that every child needs their parent's protection and guidance. My discussion with my E buddy about my opinion on gender matters shouldn't be a standard to raise an obviously unnecessary arguments. There is no weak link to tie here, you are not bringing in any new dimension.


Sorry you got it mixed up here,I am a very protective parent and don't have to do the nanny shi*t because I know my nanny can molest my son, try again. I just hope you know that your caring ,comionate ,female nanny can also molest your daughter . I don't know what having kids is all about to you but if protecting them don't top your list of priority, now that's what I will call weird.

I have no doubt that if you were to raise a Daughter, she'd be a strong woman.

Don't underestimate yourself.

byvan03:




I deal with teen girls on daily basics so I have an idea of what's like to have them around. There is nothing I won't do to protect my female child, so everyone is safer that I don't have one to protect.


Girls are so adorable, but I rather not have them. Let mine remain safe wherever they are. No one will come to my house yarning some gibberish about seeing ripe agbalumo just to take away my child. Then what if she doesn't have balls to deal with life issues? She will call me crying when hurt abi? That will shatter my heart, I just can't, maybe God knows that I can't deal. I pray it remains as it is.

cococandy:
I have no doubt that if you were to raise a Daughter, she'd be a strong woman.

Don't underestimate yourself.

Coco...
That's very encouraging, thanks dear . I really do worry too much.

In today's world? Not so much I guess.
For the parent's personal satisfaction it may be relevant.


On a side note. My mother had two of us. My brother and I. I was a typical teenage girl, mood swings and all. But everybody in my family knows I did not give my parents even 1/4 the trouble and worries my brother gave them. The only reason he is a decent human being today is because he had/has a STRONG MOTHER. Raising either genders could require you to worry a lot and be strong.

thorpido:
Do you know how to tilt the odds in favour of having a male child?It is God who determines what sex the child would be but science has shown that there are a few things you could do to increase the odds of having the sex you desire.
You could let me know if you need the info.

Bro, I honestly don't mind. Thanks

elektra:
In today's world? Not so much I guess.
For the parent's personal satisfaction it may be relevant.


On a side note. My mother had two of us. My brother and I. I was a typical teenage girl, mood swings and all. But everybody in my family knows I did not give my parents even 1/4 the trouble and worries my brother gave them. The only reason he is a decent human being today is because he had/has a STRONG MOTHER. Raising either genders could require you to worry a lot and be strong.

you are right, teenage boys tend to have more issues than girls, that's the stage they learn smoking, drinking and womanizing.

itstpia8:


Yes sir.

As your moniker says, you be man o.

lunatic

byvan03:




Any child fits in wherever the parents want the child to fit, do you think otherwise?

you were not completely honest with this answer.

Knightngale:
you were not completely honest with this answer.

This shows that you don't even believe your original post, you created this thread to get something brewing . Tell us the honest answer you anticipated.

I think its still relevant, female inheritance is not common in some tribes hence the need to birth a son at all costs.

I used to think it doesn't matter not until I saw a church member with 5 beautiful girls answer an altar call for those looking for the fruit of the womb, I was shocked.

For some people its they must have a male child and that their marriage is not secured until they have a son. I strongly believe culture plays an important role in the quest for a male child sometimes.

byvan03:




This shows that you don't even believe your original post, you created this thread to get something brewing . Tell us the honest answer you anticipated.

I gave my views but wanted honest opinions, your answer to me betrays your other submissions in this same thread.