NewStats: 3,259,436 , 8,170,108 topics. Date: Sunday, 25 May 2025 at 12:57 AM v41g

I had 2 children. When I got married, my husband had none and accepted them like his own children.

Before marriage, we had discussed about the children living with us after marriage but that couldn’t be possible anymore because we were having financial problem so we couldn’t afford to move to a bigger apartment. We were staying in a room self contain with my daughter while my son was staying with my elder brother and his wife.

Now three years after we had moved to a bigger house still my husband doesn’t want my son to come and live with us. At the moment my son is going through hard times. My sister in law has been maltreating him to an extent that he has been stealing, he was caught and beaten like an animal. My brother said he doesn’t want him in his house again. He wants me to come and collect him.

I pleaded with my husband for me to bring him with us but he said no, he should stay there because he doesn't want him to damage our children. I’m angry at him I stopped talking to him and I don’t know where my son will go because I have no mother no father it’s only my elder brother and kid sister even my sister who is married doesn’t want him. I’m pained and in tears seeing my only son suffering while I’m still alive and I’m helpless to protect him.

Your siblings that are your relatives don't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.

take him to his father na

Davash222:
Your siblings that are your relatives doesn't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.

I foot 70% of the bills , I pay my daughter school fee including my first child with my husband I pay half of her school fee ,all my son need is a place to stay, my husband won’t be the one paying his school fee

Shifi1:
take him to his father na

He is not in Nigeria

That boy has a father that should be responsible for him na.

How old is your son?

How old is your daughter?

How many kids do you have for your new husband?

Where is the father of the other kids?

Are you still in touch? If NO, what about his siblings? Are they much around?

Have you improved financially to accommodate your son?

I don't really understand this story.. Ok let me get the picture correct

------You got married 3 year ago right?
---- You got 2 kids from your previous marriage/ Relationship; one is living with U while the other was living with your relatives.

---- You don't have any kid for your present husband right?

----So which Kids was he afraid of your son corrupting or According to you "damaging" ?

Vyvyanvyvy:

I foot 70% of the bills , I pay my daughter school fee including my first child with my husband I pay half of her school fee ,all my son need is a place to stay, my husband won’t be the one paying his school fee

I do this, I do that... abeg make we hear word.
Take the boy to his dad!

Your son is not a thief. He's a small child who found himself in an unfortunate situation, and he'll surely get over it. He needs love and attention. It's difficult not to place blames. I think you should have allowed those kids to get older before marriage. Your elder brother has failed you. So also your husband. Keep appealing to your husband or take a break off to live with your kids and show them love so that they can grow properly. Marriage is not all about keeping a woman at home and raising biological children from her.

You love the mother but you no want her son in your house. Yeye husband

Davash222:

I do this, I do that... abeg make we hear word.
Take the boy to his dad!

Lol, men hate independent women see as e dey pain you.

Modified
O ye Nairaland men! I like the taste of your tears, keep crying in my mention
I said what I said with my full chest
Donate your tears here the tank is here

Your siblings that are your relatives doesn't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.



Haba!! U are acting as if he was doing her a favor by marrying her.. That mentality is so rustic in my opinion

movement2020:
How old is your son?

How old is your daughter?

How many kids do you have for your new husband?

Where is the father of the other kids?

Are you still in touch? If NO, what about his siblings? Are they much around?

Have you improved financially to accommodate your son?

He will be 12 years in August , my daughter is 6 years, I have one daughter for my husband she is 2 years and I’m pregnant with another one. Their father is not in Nigeria and I don’t have his or his siblings. Yes I have a grocery shop I foot 70% bills in my house

Vyvyanvyvy:

He will be 12 years in August , my daughter is 6 years, I have one daughter for my husband she is 2 years and I’m pregnant with another one. Their father is not in Nigeria and I don’t have his or his siblings. Yes I have a grocery shop I foot 70% bills in my house

Na Alien you born with?

Richy4:
I don't really understand this story.. Ok let me get the picture correct

------You got married 3 year ago right?
---- You got 2 kids from your previous marriage/ Relationship; one is living with U while the other was living with your relatives.

---- You don't have any kid for your present husband right?

----So which Kids was he afraid of your son corrupting or According to you "damaging" ?

Yes I got married 3 years ago and I had 2 children from previous relationship , one with my husband and I’m pregnant with another

You do not have the of the father of your children, but you think the problem is your new husband. I comment my reserve Biko.

Oyindidi:
Lol, men hate independent women see as e dey pain you

How is she independent when she’s still living with a man
If she’s independent, let her divorce the man and rent a house for herself and her kids. That’s what I call independent.
She’s begging a man to accommodate her son and you’re claiming she’s independent.

Oyindidi:
You love the mother but you no want her son in your house. Yeye husband

Don't mind him. He feels he's done her enough favour firstly by marrying her with the kids( baggage)...

Vyvyanvyvy:

He will be 12 years in August , my daughter is 6 years, I have one daughter for my husband she is 2 years and I’m pregnant with another one. Their father is not in Nigeria and I don’t have his or his siblings. Yes I have a grocery shop I foot 70% bills in my house

You foot 70% of bills in your house and yet you allow your husband to dictate to you what to do with your own son.

Madam, I don't think you are a serious person.

Personally I will rather be single than be with a man who will stand between me and my children. Even if I have to live in poverty. But you are financially capable, you just want to answer 'Mrs' at the expense of your child.

After bouncing him off relatives for years, you are now using your husband as an excuse to run from your duty.

Shame!

Richy4:
Your siblings that are your relatives doesn't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.




Haba!! U are acting as if he was doing her a favor by marrying her.. That mentality is so rustic in my opinion

Engineer, oya come and oil the rustic mentality.

Davash222:

How is she independent when she’s still living with a man
If she’s independent, let her divorce the man and rent a house for herself and her kids. That’s what I call independent.
She’s a begging a man to accommodate her son and you’re claiming she’s independent.

Watin dey pain you this afternoon? She is doing well for herself, oya start crying

Life is always easier when u have money.
How do u think the poor man will cope with all these BS??

janvier27:
Your son is not a thief. He's a small child who found himself in an unfortunate situation, and he'll surely get over it. He needs love and attention. It's difficult not to place blames. I think you should have allowed those kids to get older before marriage. Your elder brother has failed you. So also your husband. Keep appealing to your husband or take a break off to live with your kids and show them love so that they can grow properly. Marriage is not all about keeping a woman at home and raising biological children from her.

This is the entitlement we are talking about. How did her elder brother fail her? By refusing to house a thief? Do bear in mind that may have been the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Why doesn’t she send the boy to his father, after all, he’s alive

Oyindidi:
Na Allien you born with?

See the kind of question you’re asking Independent woman.
Lol

eyefordetails:

Don't mind him. He feels he's done her enough favour firstly by marrying her with the kids( baggage)...

Na yeye dey worry am, she tell am before marriage, him no back out

Oyindidi:
You love the mother but you no want her son in your house. Yeye husband

Very yeye.

janvier27:
Your son is not a thief. He's a small child who found himself in an unfortunate situation, and he'll surely get over it. He needs love and attention. It's difficult not to place blames. I think you should have allowed those kids to get older before marriage. Your elder brother has failed you. So also your husband. Keep appealing to your husband or take a break off to live with your kids and show them love so that they can grow properly. Marriage is not all about keeping a woman at home and raising biological children from her.

Thanks for nice advice. You are right my son has become a thief due to the way my sister in law has being treating him , depriving him from food and many bad things the boy had no other choice than to steel. Since I’m alive I want him to be with me and I will take good care of him

Oyindidi:
Watin dey pain you this afternoon? She is doing well for herself, oya start crying

Na you and your miss independent dey pain me with una entitlement mentality.

Complicated matters.
Too bad your relatives wouldn't accommodate your son, very few men would want to raise another man's child.
Quarreling or not talking to your husband won't profer solution.
Try make him see reasons, appeal to his conscience. Don't make it seem as if he is obligated to house your son.
Best wishes

Oyindidi:
Na Allien you born with?

He traveled to Italy and abandoned me with the children I shouldn’t waste my time waiting for him because he had move on and I’m also free to move on with my life

Davash222:

Na you and your miss independent dey pain me with una entitlement mentality.

How? The man promised to bring the boy in when they move to better place. Where your conscience dey?