NewStats: 3,263,196 , 8,179,370 topics. Date: Thursday, 05 June 2025 at 02:00 AM 6j6y3y

Hey guys,

What are your opinions on this topic. Many of my male friends thinks that the need of a woman is too much, they need to buy cosmetics, change their wardrope, spa, salon etc etc, the list is endless . Guys are afraid that their will run dry fast if they allow their wives easy access to their bank . What does that mean that we females cannot not be prudent? I don't quite agree with them.

So what do you guys think, should a husband and wife operate a t ? one will definitely earn more then the other, what damage if any can this action cause?

Personally, I think it is better if a couple operate different s for the following reasons:

1. It will check the excesses of one or both of the partners

2. At least one of the partners cannot run away with all their money

3. If one partner becomes bankrupt, the other partner's goldmine remain safe from the bank.

4. Nobody has to monitor too closely what the other partner is doing with every withdrawal

5. And finally, if the husband dies intestate and the family descends on his properties, the wife's money is safe from their reach.

@diakim, I completely agree with reasons stated in points 1 and 5. Having said that, again, it depends solely on the couple. One man's meat is another man's posion and people certanly have different ways of managing their affairs.

i won't advise it unless they also maintain other s and decide what has to be done with the money. here are some scenarios.

1. the husband dies and the family get hold of the book while the wife is still grieving and with the aid of forgers they withdraw all their life savings as their own spoils.

2. the wife makes more money than the husband and the husband decides to teach her a lesson ...... by making off with her hard-earned money

3. or worse the wife loses her life because of the greedy nature of her hubby.

t [I]ke[/I]?

In this age where couples don't even trust each other , they'll both be hustling to the bank every hour to check balance.

All the objections mentioned so far don't apply to relationships and families that are properly fuctioning. A family in which the relatives of the husband can still his chequebook is a dysfunctional family. A family in which the husband and wife cannot trust each other with money is a dysfunctional family.

If these things are normal in our country then so help us, oh God! People need to have some basic things in their relationship before talking about marriage, but these days it's all about the craving for children. People marry just to prevent their children from being labelled illegitimate.

Hmm ... Operating a t ? I don' see anything wrong with that. One thing though, the couples have to decide whether or not they want it so. If they both trust each other and deem it fit to run one, fine. After all, the money is for the running/upkeep of the family, of which they belong.

My ideal arrangement would be for there to be a t for expenses that are incurred on behalf of both parties (like accommodation, food, etc.) contributed roughly in proportion to each parties earnings. But each party should still be allowed to maintain their own individual s for their own purposes.

It's weird; I can't see the full responses of most of you so pardon me if I duplicate any responses.

I think each couple should have their own personal as well as a t where each person puts the same percentage of their earnings in (the rest, I assume would go into their personal ).

I like the idea of pecentage because that way each partner is giving the same value or chunk of their earnings. So if I make $100 a month and put 50% of it into the t , I'm putting half of my earnings, just like my husband making $20 a month who puts 50% into it is putting half of his earnings. Only the very mercenary would care that one person is putting a larger dollar value in and if this is a concern then you are not ready for the sharing and cohesiveness that marriage is supposed to bring.

So the t would be used to pay for household expenses and pretty much used for running the family unit. The personal would be for each person's personal use as they wish.

What I'd do is something like 50-75% of my earnings in the t and then divide my remaining 25-50% into savings as well as "spending money".

nothing dey happen for that end...

can't try it...and i don't advise copules to. but for such special projects like building or buying a house, children's education...well it may actually be better to have a t

Well from my point of view, i do not think that a married couple should have one . I don't believe it undermines the trust factor. It's just that you will always have one person who spends more than the other. It isn't always the female who spends more, sometimes its the guys. And its not healthy if he is aware of just how much finances he has at his disposal, or her( depending on the culprit).

I know that separate bank s can be expensive to maintain, depending on where you are, but its wise that way. keeping some for a raining day is the best defense against unforeseen circumstances.

Hi Trish,

Your topic above is very challenging and one of the best I have come across. That is why I am finding time to reply you. To discuss this topic evenly, one must put into consideration the following:

[list][li]Social status of the family.[/li]
[li]Financial status of the family.[/li]
[li]Time of marriage.[/li]
[li]Educational level.[/li][/list]

The social status of the family is an important issue to be considered. In a contemporary Nigeria where women are looked at as a tool to keeping the house and taking care of the children (rearing children), no man can consider his wife or wives worthy of sharing the same . It is truism that our culture has place no much respect to the issue of woman contributing to the family.

In the 1st place, why do you own a t ? This is to enable families to spend their monies rightly and prudently in order to train the children, eat well, cloth well, have a good shelter and above all save for future occurences. Who then takes the decision of how these money is to be spent? The Nigerian man would definately want to rule it out. This is because the wife is only a tool. One may begin to think that the writer is woman, no, I am a man and a strong one of that matter.

Before a family can think on owning a t , the financial status of the family is a strong factor to determine that. For instance, if the income of the family is not up to the required expenditure of the family, can they own a t ? The issue of t will not come up in such a family. It is because some families are financially bouyant that they can even think of ownoing a t acct.

Time of Marriage: Trish, you may agree with me that marriage thar took place within the the 60s and early 70s can not discuss the issues of t . Do not get me wrong. I agree some has but then the awareness was not as it is today. I am referring here to Nigerian families.

Education Level: With education comes civility and the ion to strive in the word finds its way into our heart. The level of one's education matters also in this case. People with little or no education at all give no importance to this kind of issues.

I am not saying or against but trying to caution to look critically into the above mentioned reasons before taking a point or stance. I am of the opinion that husband and wife should share same nos, prudentlyand tly take decision on how to spend the monies without resulting to dispute.

lai lai, lai lai, I repeat lai lai, never men dont try it o. No t o, lai lai, lai lai , lai lai

legry:

   [I]lai lai, lai lai[/I], I repeat [I]lai lai[/I], never men dont try it o.  No t o, [I]lai lai, lai lai , lai lai[/I]

Why the continued rage legry?

trish:

Hey guys,

What are your opinions on this topic. Many of my male friends thinks that the need of a woman is too much, they need to buy cosmetics, change their wardrope, spa, salon etc etc, the list is endless . Guys are afraid that their will run dry fast if they allow their wives easy access to their bank . What does that mean that we females cannot not be prudent? I don't quite agree with them.

So what do you guys think, should a husband and wife operate a t ? one will definitely earn more then the other, what damage if any can this action cause?

yep! they shld! wit ur single in a corner sha....just in case

DOMINO anger, no anger o my point still remains guyzz do not and i repeat do not open a t keep your acount and let her keep hers but perform your duties as the man to the fullest but i REPEAT one more tim do not operate a t with your wife.

WOW! Thats lovely or am i mistaken the quest? NEVER TRY IT.
Operating t sounds good but the fact that as a man you can't spend your money behind your wife make the whole thing disgusting.
Besides, your wife will eventually know your monthly earnings and in such ways will make her feel big provided she earns more than you do.
As for me i would have love to operate a t (children ) and then still have the personal ones for security reasons.
Note this: What if ones Mother needs some money fast and the wife is not around to attest the cheque, then the mother should go places? or what kind of explanation will you give?.
To cut it short i will submit that it is very good but it is not expedient according to the scriptures " All things are lawful, but not all things are expedient".

No, it's not very good for a husband and a wife to operate a t , even though it depends on the parties involved.

I would have this to say: "The husband is the head of the family and should truly be head to everything, including finanancial spending" so why must he be interested in the wife's money.

The woman should be allowed to use her money as it pleases her and the husband's own must be for the family's upkeep.

Death is inevitable and so what might happen after one partner dies should be considered, so that s should be operated separately.

The woman should be allowed to use her money as it pleases her and the husband's own must be for the family's upkeep.

what?

If this is true, I think I want to be a woman!

Yes, they can both have a t and each of them still maintains a different

yes, if i am a millionaire, why not. doesnt really matter, the main reasons why people wouldnt want to operate a t , is because of the limited funds each of them have. And therefore they have to maintain each others limited funds. So i would say why not . If i have a wife, everything that is mine is hers, and all that is hers is mine, is that not what marriage is all about?

Affluent or not you should have thesame banking .

WHy not? Reasons please

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. i do not see any reason not to have a t but the only problem that cld occur is when the two partners get divorced (it wld be crazy to split up). if u guys out there do not want to have a t just becos u think that females have a lot of needs then u must be a wanka. why wld u even have a wife and not provide for all her needs.

Hum before i marry a lady, she has to the test, of "forever together", that means no matter what occur, that would be the last option. And i pray it becomes so. Besides there are other options to divorce, if you guys have misunderstanding. But why do you marry her, if you cant understand each other.

Kazey u sound so simplistic. The real world is not that ideal

They can have one.... but they should make sure they have individual ones.

Yes, they should share an . Being married means you need to learn to work together as a team. Keeping it separate may cause rifts. My money, Your money. . .It's really OUR money. It will go to pay the same bills that need to be paid, it goes to buy the same food that needs to be eaten and it goes to pay the same rent that they may have a roof over their heads.

I would suggest one and one ant. Both names are on the . Write out an expense (budget) sheet. Know how much money comes in, where it needs to go and what's left for "entertainment." It will teach discipline and team work.

well it depends on the relationship. for some it works out fine and for others it doesn't. but that doesn't mean i group loves each other than the other. it's just choice and preferences.

Depends on the type of .

***An where any of them is a signatory
***An when both of them are signatories.

The second is ok but would say hell NO to the first.

t is okay when you have separate ones aside too. But having all your earnings go to just one which happens to be t is not the best. (me tink o). Money they say spoils friends faces o.

Again, i personally love giving surprises, and i think solely t will spoil that especially when it's a bit or even really expensive surprises for him.

layi:

Depends on the type of .

***An where any of them is a signatory
***An when both of them are signatories.

The second is ok but would say hell NO to the first.

what's wrong with the first?

monister